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SMART CONDOMS - Printable Version

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SMART CONDOMS - Duchess - 03-02-2017



A condom that rates your performance. What do you think, gentlemen?

The world's first 'smart condom' which rates a man's sexual performances and can detect STIs has been created by scientists.

The i-Con Smart Condom is billed as the newest form of wearable technology in the ever-growing market.

Providing a range of statistics, including duration, speed and girth measurements, male users are able to assess their sexual prowess.

The device also records the amount of calories burnt, different positions and can detect chlamydia and syphilis.

Story



RE: SMART CONDOMS - Maggot - 03-02-2017

Do we really want condoms to be smarter than the person using them? It opens up a Pandora's box of technical voodoo.


RE: SMART CONDOMS - Midwest Spy - 03-02-2017

There's only one stat that counts:

Was I hard enough, for a long enough time, to send my gal into back-arching, nail-grinding mode.

She don't need no smart condom to figure THAT out.


RE: SMART CONDOMS - sally - 03-02-2017

It would kind of put a damper on it to detect STD's during sex, don't ya think?

Jesus Christ, you got the clap! I think I'll just be leaving now while praying that smart condom didn't have a hole in it.


RE: SMART CONDOMS - HairOfTheDog - 03-02-2017

These smart condoms are dumb.

Nothing like adding more performance pressure to really spice things up.

And, I can just see some men disputing the results and wanting to do it again right away to try for better scores. Screw that.


RE: SMART CONDOMS - Clang McFly - 03-02-2017

Luckily I don't need to worry about a smart condom. At the rate I'm going I'll be lucky if I get to use a regular condom.


RE: SMART CONDOMS - SIXFOOTERsez - 03-02-2017

What if your condom gets hacked? How secure are the IDs on these things? I swear, that wasn't my dick!


RE: SMART CONDOMS - Duchess - 03-02-2017



Hahaha!



RE: SMART CONDOMS - Duchess - 03-02-2017

(03-02-2017, 07:03 PM)SIXFOOTERsez Wrote: What if your condom gets hacked? How secure are the IDs on these things? I swear, that wasn't my dick!


Hey! Today is your Mock anniversary. Six years!



RE: SMART CONDOMS - HairOfTheDog - 03-02-2017

(03-02-2017, 07:03 PM)SIXFOOTERsez Wrote: What if your condom gets hacked? How secure are the IDs on these things? I swear, that wasn't my dick!

hah

Happy sixth anniversary, Six.


RE: SMART CONDOMS - Carsman - 03-02-2017

Agree with HotD, (can't believe I said that) These Smart Condoms are DUMB! Insane

They can put them all in the Edsel! hah


RE: SMART CONDOMS - HairOfTheDog - 03-02-2017

Hey! You agree with me plenty and you know it, Cars.

I agree with you sometimes too.

But, it is good to see you openly admitting it for a change (even if it is only about dumb smart condoms). Smiley_emoticons_smile


RE: SMART CONDOMS - BigMark - 03-02-2017

A smart one would make you think about baseball at the right time.


RE: SMART CONDOMS - Midwest Spy - 03-02-2017

My 'go to' stat was Jack Morris' ERA during his years with the Tigers (even though I'm a Twins fan).

He had some good seasons from '84-'88, and being a native of St Paul who eventually pitched a 10 inning masterpiece in Game 7 of the 1991 WS, he bacame I guy I could turn my thoughts toward when things were about to 'get away from me.'

lol


RE: SMART CONDOMS - Maggot - 03-02-2017

Getting hacked in the dick department sounds bad.


RE: SMART CONDOMS - sally - 03-02-2017

(03-02-2017, 09:07 PM)Midwest Spy Wrote: My 'go to' stat was Jack Morris' ERA during his years with the Tigers (even though I'm a Twins fan).

He had some good seasons from '84-'88, and being a native of St Paul who eventually pitched a 10 inning masterpiece in Game 7 of the 1991 WS, he bacame I guy I could turn my thoughts toward when things were about to 'get away from me.'

lol

I think about Charles Krauthammer.


RE: SMART CONDOMS - Midwest Spy - 03-02-2017

(03-02-2017, 10:00 PM)sally Wrote:
(03-02-2017, 09:07 PM)Midwest Spy Wrote: My 'go to' stat was Jack Morris' ERA during his years with the Tigers (even though I'm a Twins fan).

He had some good seasons from '84-'88, and being a native of St Paul who eventually pitched a 10 inning masterpiece in Game 7 of the 1991 WS, he bacame I guy I could turn my thoughts toward when things were about to 'get away from me.'

lol

I think about Charles Krauthammer.

Who'd he play for?


RE: SMART CONDOMS - SIXFOOTERsez - 03-02-2017

Wow, six years! Whoda thunk it?


RE: SMART CONDOMS - Duchess - 03-03-2017



Condoms in general are a turn off and a smart condom isn't something I'd ever be interested in. I feel certain he'd be able to know what kind of job he was doing without me ever saying a word.