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Top 100 most embarrassing moments
#1
100. I was in my early twenties and I said to my family, "There's a party in my mouth and everyone is coming" or did I say, "Invited?" I can't recall. But it was my birthday, but I had no idea what that fucking saying meant, I just said it as we were all taking the obligatory birthday photos.
My family was supper conservative growing up.
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#2
99. I was a sophomore in high school and in Spanish class and we had to write Spanish dialogue using certain vocabulary words. I made a gay erotic conversation about 2 dudes talking about eating each other's beach balls. I thought I was being clever making sexual innuendo in Spanish and if I was caught I could claim that they were taking it the wrong way. Instead my high school principal asked if I was gay and my super conservative Catholic parents were pissed. Not fun times.


Edit: Maybe this should be in the Confessions thread?
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#3
LOL

98. I texted my housemates 20 something daughter asking about the blueberry pancakes, only auto correct replaced pancakes with panties. I had come home and hoped there were still leftovers from the morning and I found the last 2 pancakes in the compost pile so I said, "what happened to the panties? Were they terrible? I would have eaten them."
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#4
97. I found a phone in the bathroom stall once and took a picture of my hairy ass with it and left it there. I would have sent it to someone butt I didn't know how.
You couldn't get a clue during the clue mating season in a field full of horny clues if you smeared your body with clue musk and did the clue mating dance.
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#5
I slept with the wife of a friend I had. Had never met her before and picked her up at a party when he was out of town. We figured it out the next morning. I don't think she ever told him
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#6
95. Just last year at an all you can eat sushi restaurant I ordered edamame despite not knowing what it was. Awkwardly had to tell the waitress we weren't going to eat that. They didn't even charge me extra despite having a policy that stated they would if you didn't eat what you ordered.
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#7
Why didn't you want to eat the edamame? I could never figure out if you were supposed to eat the whole thing or just open it up and eat the insides. I've done both.
@Maggot hilarious
@six wow awkward!
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#8
(01-04-2018, 10:28 PM)Love Child Wrote: Why didn't you want to eat the edamame? I could never figure out if you were supposed to eat the whole thing or just open it up and eat the insides. I've done both.
@Maggot hilarious
@six wow awkward!

It tasted bland. Just ick. I didn't know how to eat it either. I just kind of licked it and then bit into it.
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#9
I looked it up, you put it in your mouth, taste the salt and then pop it open so the inner pods land on your tongue and then you discard the shell.
Now I know!
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#10


Embarrassing moments. Ugh. I have many but the one that still makes me cringe years later is this one -

Back when I used to drink I went to a sports bar for lunch with a group of girlfriends, all great looking women. We used to get hit on whenever we were out even though that wasn't what we were looking for. On this particular day rather than leaving when lunch was over we stayed, all afternoon and into the early evening, we were shitfaced. We were sitting at the bar and there was a group of guys at a table behind us, we couldn't help but notice them checking us out and the more they looked and talked among themselves the more irate some of us became, we were drunk & belligerent and it reached the point that I marched my ass over to them and ranted. When I finished one of the guys said, ma'am, (and being called ma'am set me off even more), we are watching the game on the TV above your heads. It was then that I would have given every penny I had if the floor would have opened wide and swallowed me whole. My face burns as I recall this. Ugh.
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#11
(01-05-2018, 12:49 AM)Love Child Wrote: I looked it up, you put it in your mouth, taste the salt and then pop it open so the inner pods land on your tongue and then you discard the shell.
Now I know!

Good. It wasn't my fault, I didn't taste any salt. And it was big bowl of them. I don't think I could have finished them eating them the proper way either.
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#12
It's chinese fucking peanuts for godsake. Better when they are warm...
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#13
I've tried them a couple of times at Japanese restaurants, they're not bad. And yeah it's like an Asian version of a boiled peanut. They should be warm and salty like Clang's balls after a stressful day down at the DMV. You pop them open and eat the beans as an appetizer with a Japanese beer.
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#14
I'd like to see you pop open clangs balls and eat them.
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#15
Did I just say that? Holy fuck edit edit!
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#16
Thats a pretty good story Duchess. I would have been completely embarrassed.

93. I sent my mom a selfie of me, looking sexily up to the camera as I lay in bed. It was not a nude selfie....I mean you could see my shoulders. LOL OMG
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#17
(01-06-2018, 04:18 AM)Love Child Wrote: LOL OMG


That made me laugh.

I think embarrassing moments are probably much worse for those who don't have the ability to laugh at themselves.
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#18
(01-05-2018, 11:10 PM)sally Wrote: I've tried them a couple of times at Japanese restaurants, they're not bad. And yeah it's like an Asian version of a boiled peanut. They should be warm and salty like Clang's balls after a stressful day down at the DMV. You pop them open and eat the beans as an appetizer with a Japanese beer.

I love penis....er...peanuts. I'll have to try edamame again sometime.

(01-05-2018, 11:20 PM)BigMark Wrote: I'd like to see you pop open clangs balls and eat them.



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#19
Leaving an appointment at a swanky house I dropped something on the doorstep, while bending over my pants LOUDLY ripped, like 18 inches! I slowly straightened up, squared my shoulders and marched to my car.
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#20
(01-06-2018, 12:02 PM)Clang McFly Wrote:
(01-05-2018, 11:10 PM)sally Wrote: I've tried them a couple of times at Japanese restaurants, they're not bad. And yeah it's like an Asian version of a boiled peanut. They should be warm and salty like Clang's balls after a stressful day down at the DMV. You pop them open and eat the beans as an appetizer with a Japanese beer.

I love penis....er...peanuts. I'll have to try edamame again sometime.


At many Salad Bars, edamames are are supplied on the Bar as one of the topping to sprinkle on a Salad if desired. (they're good)


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Carsman: Loves Living Large

Life is short, make the most of it, get outta here!
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