HILLARY FOR PRESIDENT

[Duchess]

Dear Hillary,

Please don't bring God into the convention. He doesn't approve of this bullshit and he needs to be left at home.

Please don't make my country sound like it's the final frontier inhabited by zombies.

Please don't make it sound like ISIS is hiding in quiet, little cul-de-sacs across America when the reality is I have more to fear from my fellow Americans.

Please don't tell any pants on fire lies. I will be fact checking daily and I can't be your surrogate if I have to defend lies. I'll leave that to the Trump campaign and his supporters, they do it so much better and in such colorful ways. For example, they don't mind blaming Sparkle pony for any gaffes.

I'm with you, Hillary.