Mock

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(05-02-2016, 10:40 AM)Duchess Wrote: [ -> ]
(05-02-2016, 09:58 AM)sally Wrote: [ -> ]Are you sure it wasn't a ham and you accidentally punctured the glaze packet?

I know the difference between a turkey & a ham, woman.

Fucking cooking bullshit. Christ on a cracker.

That's why I don't do it!

I don't know why I keep trying. I can run a backhoe but I can't cook. Jesus.

(05-02-2016, 11:15 AM)Duchess Wrote: [ -> ]

I don't know why I keep trying. I can run a backhoe but I can't cook. Jesus.

You keep trying because you want to please your man.

Reminds of the effort put forth by this Colombian woman I was seeing after I had split up with my first wife (Panamanian).

She wanted me to marry her so she could get her green card. She was staying with me for a few days.

She'd greet me at the door when I came home from work wearing a g-string and see through negligee.

Her cooking was phenomenal and after the meal I'd do her right on the table.

However, I had already had my fill of crazy Latinas so I didn't marry her.

She could cook and fuck.

You keep aiming high Duchess. You'll get there.

(05-02-2016, 02:36 PM)Midwest Spy Wrote: [ -> ]Reminds of the effort put forth by this Colombian woman I was seeing after I had split up with my first wife (Panamanian).

She wanted me to marry her so she could get her green card. She was staying with me for a few days.

She'd greet me at the door when I came home from work wearing a g-string and see through negligee.

Her cooking was phenomenal and after the meal I'd do her right on the table.

^ Proof that non-citizens are often willing to do the dirty jobs others won't in order to secure a living in this country.

(05-02-2016, 02:57 PM)HairOfTheDog Wrote: [ -> ]
(05-02-2016, 02:36 PM)Midwest Spy Wrote: [ -> ]Reminds of the effort put forth by this Colombian woman I was seeing after I had split up with my first wife (Panamanian).

She wanted me to marry her so she could get her green card. She was staying with me for a few days.

She'd greet me at the door when I came home from work wearing a g-string and see through negligee.

Her cooking was phenomenal and after the meal I'd do her right on the table.

^ Proof that non-citizens are often willing to do the dirty jobs others won't in order to secure a living in this country.

Very true!

(05-02-2016, 04:10 PM)Midwest Spy Wrote: [ -> ]
(05-02-2016, 02:57 PM)HairOfTheDog Wrote: [ -> ]
(05-02-2016, 02:36 PM)Midwest Spy Wrote: [ -> ]Reminds of the effort put forth by this Colombian woman I was seeing after I had split up with my first wife (Panamanian).

She wanted me to marry her so she could get her green card. She was staying with me for a few days.

She'd greet me at the door when I came home from work wearing a g-string and see through negligee.

Her cooking was phenomenal and after the meal I'd do her right on the table.

^ Proof that non-citizens are often willing to do the dirty jobs others won't in order to secure a living in this country.

Very true!

I remember when I was a handy man and hot women would call me over to fix random things in their homes. They always answered the door in sexy lingerie and... No, that was Penthouse forum. Never mind.

(05-02-2016, 06:50 PM)Blindgreed1 Wrote: [ -> ]I remember when I was a handy man and hot women would call me over to fix random things in their homes. They always answered the door in sexy lingerie and... No, that was Penthouse forum. Never mind.

Yeah whenever I'm home alone and order pizza I always answer the door in my bra and short skirt hoping for some hot guy to be standing there. Unfortunately for me our local pizza delivery guy is a woman who looks like Chaz Bono.

(05-02-2016, 02:36 PM)Midwest Spy Wrote: [ -> ]You keep aiming high Duchess. You'll get there.

Cooking for someone isn't exactly my idea of aiming high. If anyone wants a cook they can get a goddamn hausfrau.

I don't judge Sally.

Someone made me some Chinese and it was delicious but the rice was...different. It looked like angel hair pasta and it fucked with my head enough that I couldn't taste rice, I tasted pasta. Has anyone seen that rice?

Yeah I've seen it but have no clue what it's called, long rice? hah

Sometimes I eat stuff, I don't even know what it is but I smile and dig in, I even say I like it if I know what's good for me.

It was probably Rice noodles. I love ramen and udon noodles. There are plenty of places to get adventurous around here. This is the McDonalds of noodles but i'm a round eye and don't know any better.

http://www.ajisencalifornia.com/

I just bought this cookbook. I'm going to cook stuff & it's going to be delicious.

[Image: original-screen-shot-2015-12-15-at-10-55...6dbffb.jpg]

That's such an odd choice for a cookbook. Most people start off learning from the masters like Julia Childs and you pick freaking Chrissy Teigen. Good luck, crazy lady.

Julia Child? Hahaha! Who's the crazy lady here. Shit. I'll be gettin' a laugh out of that for the rest of the night. Julia Child. Hear me snort.

I use the ones created by people that live around here. They're from the 50's simple and tasty. But only every few months or so. Sally has some good stuff though. Duchess scares me a little, Betty Crocker she's not but sometimes she has good stuff like that dessert thing with bananas I tried but I screwed it up by not using instant pudding and it had to be poured into a glass with tequila in the end.

Sally just wanted to be the first person to call me crazy. She likes to get drunk so she's probably called crazy all the time.

Her cookbook has good reviews so I shouldn't knock it until I look through it. What are you cooking out of it first?

(05-18-2016, 10:24 AM)sally Wrote: [ -> ]What are you cooking out of it first?

Right off the bat, I'm thinking her zucchini fries, they are baked, not fried. She does does something with spaghetti squash I'd like to try and her recipe for prosciutto figs looks great.

This book was recommended to me. Apparently a monkey could have a success with it. Sarcastic

FAHQTOO

Duchess

Midwest Spy

HairOfTheDog

Midwest Spy

Blindgreed1

sally

Duchess

Blindgreed1

Duchess

Maggot

BigMark

BigMark

Duchess

sally

Duchess

Maggot

Duchess

sally

Duchess