Whole Foods...

[BlueTiki]

The part where he says he's going to pay his 80 bucks for 6 things and get the heck out is the reason I don't go to the whole foods store here. That place is ridiculous.

Trader Joe's is a better value

Better value but the same fucked up parking situation inside an out.

Damned "blue veins" crowding around the sample tables and causing a jam. Even trading dirty looks and throwing elbows with anyone trying to get by their "senior freebie scrum".

And all of them smelling like cheap air freshener.

It's like they never had a cracker with organic blueberry jam in their entire life.

And how long does it take to dispense 1 ounce of coffee from a coffee maker with a spigot? Why must they stand in front of the damn coffee maker while they take their first sip instead of moving to the side, allowing someone else a chance for a cup?

And their endless drone, louder than the in-store music, about their medical conditions, the weather, their favorite "cheap" red wine and their lactose intolerance makes me wanna bust a cap in someone's ass and not bring in my own shopping bags.

And don't get me started on the yoga moms with their "little helper" kids, with their little shopping carts, clogging up the damned isles, while mom prattles on and on about what a "good little shopper" Hayden or Hanna is and how she's going to make gluten-free mac and cheese for her when they get home.

Or at least this what I've been told.