05-03-2016, 10:46 AM
Sitting here twiddling my thumbs. @User I feel your pain. The ex-wife has been calling me recently because our boy has become a bit of a pothead, 18 and freshly licensed, two months from the end of senior year So he's basically a dick who won't mind. She has zero control so she calls me for backup, and my first thought is 'you stupid bitch, ten years ago you used money and lawyers to beat me down because I wanted one more fucking day per week to co-parent our child. You forced me to settle for "weekend warrior dad" status and bankrupted me in the process, how the fuck did you think it was gonna turn out?'
But of course I smile and listen, because kill em with kindness is my mantra. Then she says she made him give up his pot and she flushed it so he called her an idiot, and I'm thinking of when I was a teenage pothead I had an 'in case of capture' stash that was a couple of roaches and some shake stems and shit for just such occasions. A bait bag for nosy parents so they'd think they found it and stop looking. Even had some oregano in there to flesh it out. But I didn't share that thought.
Finally she says " and if he gets put in jail he's not a big person, there are men who would really go after him".
That time I did laugh. I can't believe she went with the old prison-rape threat because the kid won't get up for economics. FFS. Now I KNOW why I can't make relationships last. I keep picking the crazies!
But of course I smile and listen, because kill em with kindness is my mantra. Then she says she made him give up his pot and she flushed it so he called her an idiot, and I'm thinking of when I was a teenage pothead I had an 'in case of capture' stash that was a couple of roaches and some shake stems and shit for just such occasions. A bait bag for nosy parents so they'd think they found it and stop looking. Even had some oregano in there to flesh it out. But I didn't share that thought.
Finally she says " and if he gets put in jail he's not a big person, there are men who would really go after him".
That time I did laugh. I can't believe she went with the old prison-rape threat because the kid won't get up for economics. FFS. Now I KNOW why I can't make relationships last. I keep picking the crazies!
Thank god I am oblivious to the opinions of others while caught in the blinding splendor of my own cleverness.