IT'S A BRAND NEW WEEK!

[Duchess]

I chickened out and threw the canvass letter away instead of mailing it. Duchess was right. I'm not cut out for that level of stress and people interaction. I'm more suited to grunt work and low level human interaction. I was just fooling myself into thinking I could be better/different than what I am now.

I'm a fucking coward. I didn't even discuss it with my bosses like I told my Dad and brother.

On the bright side they did give me something new to learn. ELT Kickout sheets, whatever they are.

Clang, stop. You're not a coward, you obviously felt up to the challenge. Something happened, something took a shot at your confidence. What was it? You have to learn to identify what triggers that so you can avoid it in the future. Can you get a copy of that letter? If so, get it and mail it in, apply for the job and do so with every intention of getting it. You are capable!