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The World's Oldest Profession
#1
Prostitution has often been coined as the world's oldest profession. But I ask, "Really"? I mean did Adam and Eve start it?
Adam was like, "Hey Eve, you gotta start earning your keep around here"
"What do you mean?" Asks Eve.
"Well the fruit isn't just going to fall off the tree you know"
"But it did Adam, I already explained that to you, and the serpent"
"Okay okay, thats not what I meant. What I meant is now that our nakedness is forbideen, we no longer have free food, we are going to have to eat and buy clothes to wear, and one of us has to make the money to get these things and it is going to have to be you"

So Adam was the first recorded pimp in history. People just don't talk about it.
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#2


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#3
I love that song! Haven't heard it in to long a time.
You couldn't get a clue during the clue mating season in a field full of horny clues if you smeared your body with clue musk and did the clue mating dance.
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#4
(04-21-2018, 08:40 PM)Love Child Wrote: Prostitution has often been coined as the world's oldest profession. But I ask, "Really"? I mean did Adam and Eve start it?
Adam was like, "Hey Eve, you gotta start earning your keep around here"
"What do you mean?" Asks Eve.
"Well the fruit isn't just going to fall off the tree you know"
"But it did Adam, I already explained that to you, and the serpent"
"Okay okay, thats not what I meant. What I meant is now that our nakedness is forbideen, we no longer have free food, we are going to have to eat and buy clothes to wear, and one of us has to make the money to get these things and it is going to have to be you"

So Adam was the first recorded pimp in history. People just don't talk about it.

Adam never got the proper Kudo's or even a knuckle crunch.
You couldn't get a clue during the clue mating season in a field full of horny clues if you smeared your body with clue musk and did the clue mating dance.
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#5
(04-21-2018, 10:56 PM)Maggot Wrote:
(04-21-2018, 08:40 PM)Love Child Wrote: Prostitution has often been coined as the world's oldest profession. But I ask, "Really"? I mean did Adam and Eve start it?
Adam was like, "Hey Eve, you gotta start earning your keep around here"
"What do you mean?" Asks Eve.
"Well the fruit isn't just going to fall off the tree you know"
"But it did Adam, I already explained that to you, and the serpent"
"Okay okay, thats not what I meant. What I meant is now that our nakedness is forbideen, we no longer have free food, we are going to have to eat and buy clothes to wear, and one of us has to make the money to get these things and it is going to have to be you"

So Adam was the first recorded pimp in history. People just don't talk about it.

Adam never got the proper Kudo's or even a knuckle crunch.



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#6
(04-21-2018, 08:40 PM)Love Child Wrote: Prostitution has often been coined as the world's oldest profession. But I ask, "Really"? I mean did Adam and Eve start it?
Adam was like, "Hey Eve, you gotta start earning your keep around here"
"What do you mean?" Asks Eve.
"Well the fruit isn't just going to fall off the tree you know"
"But it did Adam, I already explained that to you, and the serpent"
"Okay okay, thats not what I meant. What I meant is now that our nakedness is forbideen, we no longer have free food, we are going to have to eat and buy clothes to wear, and one of us has to make the money to get these things and it is going to have to be you"

So Adam was the first recorded pimp in history. People just don't talk about it.

They probably don't talk about it because he was pimping out his kids to have sex with each other.

Adam: We just had a baby boy. I hope we have a baby girl next.
Eve: Why?
Adam: So the boy can have sex with her.
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#7
Good thing it was all boys in your family.
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#8
(04-22-2018, 04:00 PM)BigMark Wrote: Good thing it was all boys in your family.

hah
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#9
(04-21-2018, 08:40 PM)Love Child Wrote: Prostitution has often been coined as the world's oldest profession. But I ask, "Really"? I mean did Adam and Eve start it?
Adam was like, "Hey Eve, you gotta start earning your keep around here"
"What do you mean?" Asks Eve.
"Well the fruit isn't just going to fall off the tree you know"
"But it did Adam, I already explained that to you, and the serpent"
"Okay okay, thats not what I meant. What I meant is now that our nakedness is forbideen, we no longer have free food, we are going to have to eat and buy clothes to wear, and one of us has to make the money to get these things and it is going to have to be you"

So Adam was the first recorded pimp in history. People just don't talk about it.
Adam and Eve had seven children. Only two of which were girls. Some kinky shit going on up in that garden.
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#10
I've always thought that Adam and Eve were the first primate/humans mutation that had the first gift of knowledge. They were the first to through evolution that realized that sex was fun, that questioned their existence and basically had the new brains that homo-sapiens have today. And I bet that Eve was the first convincing Adam that they were allowed to question their surroundings. People take that story to literally.

Eve was the first to discover the "Power of the pussy"
You couldn't get a clue during the clue mating season in a field full of horny clues if you smeared your body with clue musk and did the clue mating dance.
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#11
(05-05-2018, 12:34 PM)Maggot Wrote: Eve was the first to discover the "Power of the pussy"

The first to discover beastiality too. I bet Satan in serpent form slithered in and out of her pussy more than a few times.
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#12
You can do better Simon.
You couldn't get a clue during the clue mating season in a field full of horny clues if you smeared your body with clue musk and did the clue mating dance.
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#13
(05-05-2018, 09:39 PM)Maggot Wrote: You can do better Simon.

Ok.

Genesis 6:9 And lo, the slippery serpentine beast doth slithered to and fro from Eve's moist Holy and divine virginal maidenhead.

hah
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#14


Why is paying for a piece of ass against the law?
[Image: Zy3rKpW.png]
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#15
(05-07-2018, 12:28 PM)Duchess Wrote:

Why is paying for a piece of ass against the law?

I don't know why either. Make it like Taco bell and have a health certificate that is renewed every month. Post it in a plain view area though.
You couldn't get a clue during the clue mating season in a field full of horny clues if you smeared your body with clue musk and did the clue mating dance.
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#16
(05-07-2018, 12:28 PM)Duchess Wrote:

Why is paying for a piece of ass against the law?

I don't know. Why would Atlantic City pimps think anyone would pay $30 to have sex with an a short ugly 16 year old girl with greasy hair and shit stained underwear?
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#17
(05-08-2018, 05:39 PM)Clang McFly Wrote: Why would Atlantic City pimps think anyone would pay $30 to have sex with an a short ugly 16 year old girl with greasy hair and shit stained underwear?


I think there might be a market for that.
[Image: Zy3rKpW.png]
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