SARAH PALIN

[Cracker]

I've probably been to church more than you've ever been. Forget the Lord's prayer, I can recite the Nicene Creed, the Apostle's Creed and the 23^rd Psalm by memory. I astonished my dumb 6^th grade teacher (and classmates) when she asked if anyone knew what the Greek word for fish was...duh, Ixthus.

Only children of crackheads don't know the 23^rd Psalm (it is the only scripture most people can recite KJV if they aren't all creepy-religious). United Methodists, or Catholic Ultra-Lite, do the Apostle's Creed at the beginning of every service and have monthly Eucharist. I'm a heathen and even I can regurgitate it on demand.

You are going to have to spit out a story of faith to get me on board with your piety...