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Full Version: WHAT DO YOU OWE THEM?
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This isn't a question just for parents.

Do parents owe their children a college education?

What exactly does one owe their kids?
No. Not even good parents with financial stability.

However, poor minority parents owe their kids nothing. Society in general will give them a free education.
No, parents don't "owe" the kids an education.

Having said that, however, most parents feel they want their kids to succeed in life. And in today's world to succeed, "most times", the better educated the kids are, they better they do in the job market. So many parents assist their kids with, or even foot the bill for their kids education.
IMO
I recently had this conversation with a friend whose daughter just started college. She and her husband just could not do it. They did save money through the years, and encouraged their daughter to put some of all gift money into college savings. What they did feel they "owed" their daughter was their support and encouragement. They helped her look for grants and scholarships, chose an affordable school, and gave her a promise they would financially support IF she needed it, and IF she proved she was willing to support herself as well. Daughter is now finishing first semester in school of choice. Has found that she does not feel she can afford it, and has decided with parents support to switch to a community college, for now.
Teaching responsibility and limits.
You don't owe it to them, but I guess if they're a good student and college material then they deserve a helping hand if you can afford it. However, there is nothing written that you have to pay their way through college while they're fucking off and not even serious about it.
You owe them food, shelter, clothing, safety, education and love until they're 18. After that, if they're motivated to continue their education, I think it's great to support and encourage that within reason.
The cost of a college education is nucking futs these days. I know a ton of parents who are having their 4.0+ kids attend a community college for a year or two before they transfer to the UC system or some other more prestigious university. Makes sense to me. Get ur general ed requirements met and then graduate from a better school. It's a lot easier to transfer in to those schools as a sophomore than it is to get in as a freshman anyway.
I owe them a swift kick in the ass. If they are worthy sure. Otherwise a swift kick in the ass.............just in case they fuck up, or for all the times they missed out on a swift kick in the ass. Punt return type.


There have been instances where kids have sued their parents for tuition and one recent case where the judge ordered the divorced parents to each pay half. That's bullshit.

I really can't stand this sense of entitlement crap. I might feel differently had I not had to work for everything I have but that's not the case. It's probably why I can't stand a lazy bastard either.
(11-17-2014, 06:51 AM)Duchess Wrote: [ -> ]

There have been instances where kids have sued their parents for tuition and one recent case where the judge ordered the divorced parents to each pay half. That's bullshit.

My first husband and I divorced in 2002. We had to hire a lawyer, not because we were fighting with each other, but because the state wanted a clause put in our agreement that stated we would each pay half the kids college tuition.
Also I'm not willing to pay for some bullshit degree that isn't going to do them any good. I know plenty of people with college degrees that are in their 40's and still working for chump change. Unless they're pursuing a career that is eventually going to make them wealthy they may as well not even go.
(11-17-2014, 11:56 AM)cannongal Wrote: [ -> ]the state wanted a clause put in our agreement that stated we would each pay half the kids college tuition.


That sounds to me like you were forced to pay for their education whether you felt you could afford to or not. That's just wrong and no judge should be putting parents in that position. I will never agree with this.
College is not the place to learn anything constructive. A trade school will benefit them twice over in the long run and possibly the short run.
(11-17-2014, 07:54 PM)Maggot Wrote: [ -> ]College is not the place to learn anything constructive. A trade school will benefit them twice over in the long run and possibly the short run.

Maggot, you have a good point. But so many feel it is a college degree or nothing. Shit, we still need auto mechanics and other people with those type skills.