(03-19-2011, 05:52 PM)IMaDick Wrote:

(03-19-2011, 05:20 PM)Midwest Spy Wrote:

(03-19-2011, 04:39 PM)Ordinary Peephole Wrote: Thats what a toilet is for numbnuts, or do you brush your teeth in the bowl?

Hey, until you've tried toiletwater don't bash it.

I was trying to get Duchess' take on how she tells HER guests that they CAN'T take a shit at her place.

Please read a little more thoroughly.

I do, however, like the use of 'numbnuts' as a putdown. One of my all time faves. Please use that with Dick next time he annoys you.

Stop being a pussy, numbnuts

Hey, Dickyboy, fuck you!

Numbnuts, absolutely fits you!

(03-19-2011, 06:01 PM)Midwest Spy Wrote:

(03-19-2011, 05:52 PM)IMaDick Wrote:

(03-19-2011, 05:20 PM)Midwest Spy Wrote:

(03-19-2011, 04:39 PM)Ordinary Peephole Wrote: Thats what a toilet is for numbnuts, or do you brush your teeth in the bowl?

Hey, until you've tried toiletwater don't bash it.

I was trying to get Duchess' take on how she tells HER guests that they CAN'T take a shit at her place.

Please read a little more thoroughly.

I do, however, like the use of 'numbnuts' as a putdown. One of my all time faves. Please use that with Dick next time he annoys you.

Stop being a pussy, numbnuts

Hey, Dickyboy, fuck you!

No and don't ask again.

(03-19-2011, 03:46 PM)Duchess Wrote:

Jesus Christ, OP, I don't ask my guests anything like that.

I'm being a smart ass for christssake.

My friends would NEVER shit at my house. Overnight guests have their own bathroom. Upstairs guests (such as dinner guests) are all people I know and they would NEVER shit at my house. They know I am a freak about it.

I have had girlfriends tell me they have to go because they need to go home and poop. hahaha

(03-19-2011, 04:39 PM)Ordinary Peephole Wrote:

(03-19-2011, 04:21 PM)Midwest Spy Wrote: I need some advice for my in-laws who love to come to my house and go straight to the bathroom for a big dump.

Thats what a toilet is for numbnuts, or do you brush your teeth in the bowl?

Do you pee in the sink?

I KNEW there was something wrong with you people, now the truth is out. It's a goddamn shitter!

(03-19-2011, 07:15 PM)Maggot Wrote: I KNEW there was something wrong with you people, now the truth is out. It's a goddamn shitter!

When my friends head to the bathroom, I always say, "Don't shit at my house!" hahaha They KNOW.

I would NEVER poop at a friend's house. Who leaves the dinner table and takes a dump? You people all have IBS.

(03-19-2011, 07:13 PM)Cracker Wrote: I have had girlfriends tell me they have to go because they need to go home and poop. hahaha

Who poops at someone's house? Seriously. I make a joke about this shit {no pun intended} but people just don't do that unless it's dire circumstances.

(03-19-2011, 07:23 PM)Duchess Wrote:

(03-19-2011, 07:13 PM)Cracker Wrote: I have had girlfriends tell me they have to go because they need to go home and poop. hahaha

Who poops at someone's house? Seriously. I make a joke about this shit {no pun intended} but people just don't do that unless it's dire circumstances.

I think it is a symptom of too much ass sex. They can't close their sphincter.

Do people walk around all day having to poo? My body is trained to eliminate before work and after work. I never have to poop out in public. I don't go the mall and suddenly think, "Hmm, I have to poop." I have never had to poo at a restaurant, work, or gas station (if it is a long car trip, we get a room after 8 hours).

If they had lady urinals, I would use those. As it is, I squat and never put my precious ass on the seat and try not to pee on my shoes.

Wake up, two sips of coffee, poo, done for the day.

I guess that means I won't be invited to a sleepover at your house, Cracker.

I don't understand the seeming male enjoyment of pooping. Really, is sitting on the toilet reading a magazine for ten minutes actually better than just getting it done and reading in the La-Z-Boy?

You're welcome, Duchess.

(03-19-2011, 03:28 PM)username Wrote:

(03-19-2011, 01:38 PM)thekid65 Wrote: What ya'll are failing to address is normally it's not the shit that does the clogging, but the excessive use of asswipe.

My kids will use a half a roll of t.p. and then NOT flush the toilet. So there I am, plunger in hand, sweat breaking out on my forehead. Slowly I depress the handle, wondering, wondering if the toilet is up to the job. As the water rises, I then begin to pray to the toilet Gods that the mass of water and poop will stop short of the rim and not overflow the edges of the toilet.

Sometimes my prayers are answered and sometimes not. The toilet Gods are fickle.

I remember those days well, not only too much t.p. but our girls also flushed pads, & when older ciggies down that seemingly endless pit!
As you said, toilet Gods are fickle.

I finally had the problem fixed, by having an air pressure assisted flush toilet bowl installed. And bawoooush, everything was sucked down, even the aroma!

(03-19-2011, 08:41 PM)Carsman Wrote: I finally had the problem fixed, by having an air pressure assisted flush toilet bowl installed. And bawoooush, everything was sucked down, even the aroma!

(03-19-2011, 08:36 PM)username Wrote: Wake up, two sips of coffee, poo, done for the day.

I guess that means I won't be invited to a sleepover at your house, Cracker.

I don't understand the seeming male enjoyment of pooping. Really, is sitting on the toilet reading a magazine for ten minutes actually better than just getting it done and reading in the La-Z-Boy?

You're welcome, Duchess.

You are welcome at Casa Cracker. Overnighters have their own facilities.

Coffee and a crap is universal. haha

Men DO enjoy it too much. They usually announce it. Sometimes they even want you to see it.

(03-19-2011, 08:36 PM)username Wrote: I don't understand the seeming male enjoyment of pooping. Really, is sitting on the toilet reading a magazine for ten minutes actually better than just getting it done and reading in the La-Z-Boy?

Someday when I am old and decrepit the Lay-Z-boy will serve a dual purpose.

I keep the plunger in the same place I keep my toilet brush, in the garage under the utility sink. I think it looks nasty when people keep anything behind or next to the toilet. That space should be clean and free of clutter.

(03-19-2011, 09:35 PM)sally Wrote: I keep the plunger in the same place I keep my toilet brush, in the garage under the utility sink. I think it looks nasty when people keep anything behind or next to the toilet. That space should be clean and free of clutter.

So if your toilet was in the garage would you keep the plunger and brush in the house?

(03-19-2011, 09:42 PM)IMaDick Wrote:

(03-19-2011, 09:35 PM)sally Wrote: I keep the plunger in the same place I keep my toilet brush, in the garage under the utility sink. I think it looks nasty when people keep anything behind or next to the toilet. That space should be clean and free of clutter.

So if your toilet was in the garage would you keep the plunger and brush in the house?

Why the fuck would I have a toilet in the garage?

(03-19-2011, 10:00 PM)sally Wrote:

(03-19-2011, 09:42 PM)IMaDick Wrote:

(03-19-2011, 09:35 PM)sally Wrote: I keep the plunger in the same place I keep my toilet brush, in the garage under the utility sink. I think it looks nasty when people keep anything behind or next to the toilet. That space should be clean and free of clutter.

So if your toilet was in the garage would you keep the plunger and brush in the house?

Why the fuck would I have a toilet in the garage?

That dirty thing, I can't believe that you would let it stay in the house.

come on now answer the question like a good little beach ball.

(03-19-2011, 07:53 PM)Cracker Wrote: I never have to poop out in public.

Me either! I cannot stand to even touch door knobs in public, it grosses me the hell out so I can't imagine sitting my bare bottom on something that a zillion random dirty girls have also had their nakedness on. Ugh!

If OP was in my house I would officially deem, and use, him as my plunger.

(03-20-2011, 08:47 AM)Middle Finger Wrote: If OP was in my house I would officially deem, and use, him as my plunger.

Ahh, a good ole-fashioned "Swirly". Havent seen one of those perpetrated on a wimp in a long time.

I think the main problem we have here is the pussification of American toilets. Used to be (before all this water conservation stuff) that one could flush a half a roll of asswipe down the shitter w/o having to worry.

What everyone needs is a shitter like they have in airplanes. Practically uncloggable. Those damned things will tear your nutsack off if ya flush while still sitting down.