(11-28-2016, 06:56 PM)Blindgreed1 Wrote: It was getting a little crowded in Heaven, so God decided to change the
admittance policy. The new law was that in order to get into Heaven, you had
to have a really bad day on the day that you died. The policy would go into
effect at noon the next day. So, the next day at 12:01 the first person came
to the gates of Heaven.

The Angel at the gate, remembering the new policy, promptly asked the man,
"Before I let you in, I need you to tell me how your day was going when you
died."
"No problem," the man said. "I came home to my 25^th-floor apartment on my
lunch hour and caught my wife having an affair. But her lover was nowhere in
sight.. I immediately began searching for him. My wife was half naked and
yelling at me as I searched the entire apartment.

Just as I was about to give up, I happened to glance out onto the balcony
and noticed that there was a man hanging off the edge by his fingertips!
The nerve of that guy! Well, I ran out onto the balcony and stomped on his
fingers until he fell to the ground. But wouldn't you know it, he landed in
some trees and bushes that broke his fall and he didn't die.
This ticked me off even more.
In a rage, I went back inside to get the first heavy thing I could get my
hands on to throw at him. Oddly enough, the first thing I thought of was the
refrigerator. I unplugged it, pushed it out onto the balcony, and tipped it
over the side. It plummeted 25 stories and
crushed him!

The excitement of the moment was so great that I had a heart attack and died
almost instantly."
The Angel sat back and thought a moment. Technically, the guy did have a bad
day. It was a crime of passion. So, the Angel announced, "OK, sir.. Welcome
to the Kingdom of Heaven," and let him in .

A few seconds later the next guy came up. To the Angel's surprise, it was
Donald Trump. "Mr. Trump, before I can let you in, I need to hear about what
your day was like when you died." Trump said, "No problem. But you're not
going to believe this. I was on the balcony of my 26^th floor apartment doing
my daily exercises. I had been under a lot of pressure so I was really
pushing hard to relieve my stress. I guess I got a little carried away,
slipped, and accidentally fell over the side!

Luckily, I was able to catch myself by the fingertips on the balcony below
mine. But all of a sudden this crazy man comes running out of his apartment,
starts cussing, and stomps on my fingers. Well, of course I fell. I hit some
trees and bushes at the bottom, which broke my fall, so I didn't die right
away. As I'm laying there face up on the ground, unable to move and in
excruciating pain, I see this guy push his refrigerator of all things off
the balcony. It falls the 25 floors and lands on top of me, killing me.
The Angel is quietly laughing to himself as Trump finishes his story.
"I could get used to this new policy," he thinks to himself. "Very well,"
the Angel announces. "Welcome to the Kingdom of Heaven," and he lets Trump
enter.

A few seconds later, Bill Clinton comes up to the gate. The Angel is almost
too shocked to speak. Thoughts of assassination and war pour through the
Angel's head. Finally he says, "Mr. President, please tell me what it was
like the day you died."
Clinton says, "OK, picture this. I'm naked, inside a refrigerator.....

Before anyone loses their shit, this is a joke that I passed on. I did not write/author this joke.

it is a very old joke

But once all the old fucks die off it's new again. ta-daaaaaaa

This moron is still tweet ranting. He can't stand that Hillary has gotten more votes than him.

(11-29-2016, 07:08 AM)Duchess Wrote:

This moron is still tweet ranting. He can't stand that Hillary has gotten more votes than him.

Who?

(11-29-2016, 09:20 AM)Blindgreed1 Wrote: Who?

That deranged clown Trump.

Two guys on my friends landscape crew (illegals) voted.

Against Sheriff Joe and for Trump!

Go figure.

Yesterday, these dildos and their brothers and sisters in bigotry held a car parade in North Carolina to celebrate the victory of the man who they hail for sharing their beliefs, Donald Trump.



And, today, Ben Carson, who has absolutely no related experience and I find to be one very out-there dude, has made the Trump cabinet. He's the new Secretary of Housing and Urban Development. Jesus Christ.



I hope Trump thinks twice before sending Dr. Carson to any North Carolina dildo housing projects.

(12-05-2016, 12:39 PM)HairOfTheDog Wrote: And, today, Ben Carson, who has absolutely no related experience and I find to be one very out-there dude, has made the Trump cabinet. He's the new Secretary of Housing and Urban Development.

I'm lookin' like a dufus right now.

Didn't Ben Carson just recently say he didn't want any kind of position because he wasn't qualified and had no experience? I feel certain I heard him say that.

(12-05-2016, 12:39 PM)HairOfTheDog Wrote: Yesterday, these dildos and their brothers and sisters in bigotry held a car parade in North Carolina to celebrate the victory of the man who they hail for sharing their beliefs, Donald Trump.



And, today, Ben Carson, who has absolutely no related experience and I find to be one very out-there dude, has made the Trump cabinet. He's the new Secretary of Housing and Urban Development. Jesus Christ.



I hope Trump thinks twice before sending Dr. Carson to any North Carolina dildo housing projects.

Repubs appoint a black guy to HUD, Dems appoint a hispanic. This has been going on for a while.

(12-05-2016, 01:30 PM)Duchess Wrote: I'm lookin' like a dufus right now.

Didn't Ben Carson just recently say he didn't want any kind of position because he wasn't qualified and had no experience? I feel certain I heard him say that.

You don't look like a dufus, Duchess. Carson did recently say exactly that.

I remember because I thought, "well, that's true Dr. Ben, you aren't qualified for a cabinet position - but didn't you just run for President?!"

Anyway, I guess Carson changed his mind.

(12-05-2016, 03:20 PM)HairOfTheDog Wrote: You don't look like a dufus, Duchess. Carson did recently say exactly that.

I remember because I thought, "well, that's true Dr. Ben, you aren't qualified for a cabinet position - but didn't you just run for President?!"

Anyway, I guess Carson changed his mind.

All of this...stuff, for lack of a better word because there's just so much of it lately, makes me feel like I've fallen down the rabbit hole. Hold me. Hold me, HotD.

(12-05-2016, 03:25 PM)Duchess Wrote:
All of this...stuff, for lack of a better word because there's just so much of it lately, makes me feel like I've fallen down the rabbit hole. Hold me. Hold me, HotD.

I could hold you now, but you'll probably just have to come back for more if Trump names Giuliani as Secretary of State.

Let's what until Trump fills his Cabinet.

In the meantime, I'll fill my liquor cabinet in preparation for our holdfest. ')

(12-05-2016, 03:35 PM)HairOfTheDog Wrote:

(12-05-2016, 03:25 PM)Duchess Wrote:
All of this...stuff, for lack of a better word because there's just so much of it lately, makes me feel like I've fallen down the rabbit hole. Hold me. Hold me, HotD.

I could hold you now, but you'll probably just have to come back for more if Trump names Giuliani as Secretary of State.

Let's what until Trump fills his Cabinet.

In the meantime, I'll fill my liquor cabinet in preparation for our holdfest. ')

Me, too.....me, too and don't forget, I drink vodka.....

As weird as carson is I think he was a good choice for hud, didnt he actually grow up in urban housing. And what exactly did anyone else do that was so great for hud or what exactly would they do, its not like the ghetto has come along way and now carson is going to fuck it all up. Picky motherfuckers.

I'm not being picky. It's just a weird cabinet appointment (for anybody but Trump).

I've watched and listened to Ben Carson over the last two years and think he's an effin' fruitcake; I wouldn't put him in charge of any government agency for that reason alone.

And, just because I traveled and did business in several different countries for business when I was in my 20s and 30s, doesn't make me any more qualified to be Secretary of State than Carson is to be head of HUD because he spent some of his childhood years in a housing project, in my opinion.

A wacky retired neurosurgeon, author, and FOX commentator with zero government or housing experience doesn't seem like the best candidate to head the government agency. But, he was loyal to Trump and I know rewarding loyalty is a factor in the Trump administration cabinet picks.

Anyway, maybe Carson will do fine. I hope so. But, I won't be surprised if he jumps ship in a short amount time. His own comments and demeanor made me think he's not really interested in the job.

That's rich. What fucking experience does the current pendejo have?


https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Julian_Castro

Well, gee whiz Biggie, is that a rhetorical question? It answers itself just by reading the link you posted.

Castro was a political activist, a councilman active in development/real estate projects, and had 5 years of government management/budget experience under his belt as Mayor or San Antonio before being appointed to lead HUD. During his tenure as mayor, he led the effort to develop the urban area.

And, to the best of my knowledge, he's not batshit.

Active in real estate, he looked up his house on zillow one time! He was a mayor, big woop.

I guess you didn't read the link you posted or any other information on Castro's related experience before he was appointed, Biggie. That's your best bet for getting your question answered. Do your own homework. You can do it, I just know you can!

His 5 years of government management/ budget experience is probably less than the classes Carson had to take to become an eccentric,renowned neurosurgeon. You're bitter and grasping at straws on this one, just admit it.