Great name, ive been on your website and now it seems you have hooters.  The wig and lipstick has me in stitches.   Can you answer this question, how is it you seem to be straight and not gay? 

Are you denying your true feelings?  My guess is that in the VIRGINITY losing quest you have got absolutely nowhere.  Because your  barking up the wrong tree.    Try Williamsburgs gay bars etc, your garb will be adimired, and you will be hit on in minutes.   

Im sure that the way you do things now will result in you getting nowhere forever, a bit like your website, with zero followers.  And a tip for you Mark, your quips arnt funny, im sure its not only me that does not understand them.  

Maybe you could put an explanation for cretins like me underneath.      In true American style i would now put a video up to make a point,  something like the Romper Room on anglia tv in the 60s.

With Miss Rosalyn.   Oh, shes the wrong sex for Ching, but right age group.   You have toys on your website cheng.

Clang isn't gay, he likes women and wants to fuck them. Cross-dressing turns him on, it doesn't turn him gay. Why is this so hard for some people to understand?

My humor must be earned, I can't make it to easy, some may require context from 2 years ago.

Is Piggy talking about colonial Williamsburg?

Why, was its knickname jibberish?

(01-22-2023, 08:50 AM)Piglet Wrote: And a tip for you Mark, your quips arnt funny, im sure its not only me that does not understand them.  

Maybe you could put an explanation for cretins like me underneath. 

Could be they aren't funny.

But a lack of understanding, on the reader's part, doesn't negate a post's humor or its inherent humorous potential.

As you used the word "cretin" . . . which in the US, we also associate with the word "loser", here's an explanation of a benign quip I thought was funny:
 

MirahM:  "Once Aussie starts giving examples she looses me."

BigMark:  "she is like a big can of wd-40."


BigMark played on a typo. "Looses" . . . where clearly MirahM meant "Loses".

Shit like typos happens all the time and I knew what she was clearly trying to convey.

Instead of being a dickhead or a spelling nazi, he played on it.

WD-40 is a spray lubricant used for "loosening nuts".  Like duct tape (or as the redneck swine in Birmingham say: "Duck tape"), it is popular throughout the US.

Did you see what I did there?  Deliberately confusing your hometown with a city in Alabama and associating your Mock name to swine . . . which is a synonym for "Cretin"?

Just for the record . . . that last statement was not an attempt at humor or cleverness, but merely as an example of how my mind associates words.

Anyway . . . back to BigMark.

His response opened many potentials of playful replies. 

Was he saying Aussie is a nut or her posts "loosens" the nuts here, in Mock, to respond?

Was he subtly taking a jab at MirahM, without resorting to an all-out pontification (which is what I'm currently doing) of her typo?

Was his post intended to elicit a response or a just silent chuckle?

I dunno . . . I have no idea where he was wanting to go with this.  I never interpreted it as being malicious towards any member.

However,  I thought it was a clever play on a typo.

If I had "choosen" to respond, I'd probably would have posted something completely lacking in my usual ego-centric brilliance or attempted humor.

Something simple . . . like: "I see what you did there.".

Birmingham makes me think of Steven Wright . . . not the comedian.

You understood that, didn't you?

Ta!

brilliant.

(01-22-2023, 09:08 AM)Duchess Wrote: Clang isn't gay, he likes women and wants to fuck them. Cross-dressing turns him on, it doesn't turn him gay. Why is this so hard for some people to understand?

@Piglet: Yeah what she said. Couldn't say it better myself.

Also, you must be a grade A retard if you can't understand BigMark's quips. Even a big fat dummy like me can understand them.

He puts the fat lip, in quips.

(01-22-2023, 09:08 AM)Duchess Wrote: Clang isn't gay, he likes women and wants to fuck them. Cross-dressing turns him on, it doesn't turn him gay. Why is this so hard for some people to understand?

Well I don't understand it 100 percent, Dr. Ruth. Why does he fantasize about a sex change and male attention?Sounds pretty fucking gay if you ask me, but apparently you're the expert.

He sewed a sock puppet in his shorts the wrong way.

(01-22-2023, 11:56 PM)sally Wrote:

(01-22-2023, 09:08 AM)Duchess Wrote: Clang isn't gay, he likes women and wants to fuck them. Cross-dressing turns him on, it doesn't turn him gay. Why is this so hard for some people to understand?

Well I don't understand it 100 percent, Dr. Ruth. Why does he fantasize about a sex change and male attention?Sounds pretty fucking gay if you ask me, but apparently you're the expert.

I fantasize about a sex change because I feel me dressing as a woman would be more acceptable and normalized if I was a woman. Judging by all the body swap/crossdressing movies and TV shows I've seen, I'm not one.

I don't have sexual experience beyond kissing and masturbating, so the rare fantasizing about male attention is because I'm curious and because I like the feeling of knowing I could pass as a woman.

I'm not aroused at the thought of another man's dick. I'm repulsed by the thought of a dick up my ass.

It's all Ricky Schroeder's fault. Seeing him in that Silver Spoons season 2 episode got me curious about wearing women's clothing, which later became a turn on.

with needle and ted.

I love that BlueTiki assumed it was a typo and that I didn't really think I typed it correctly. (I had actually missed it until I saw the top of your post and I was like, "DOH!)

(01-22-2023, 11:56 PM)sally Wrote: Well I don't understand it 100 percent, Dr. Ruth. Why does he fantasize about a sex change and male attention?Sounds pretty fucking gay if you ask me, but apparently you're the expert.

It looks like Clang has explained it well enough that even in your drunken, menopausal haze you should be able to understand it, if not, I'm sure Clang would take the time to walk you through it.  

Dude.

What's wrong, ma'am?

Its like you look inside my head Duchess, no i dont understand. You do, so i must presume you cross dress, hopefully, let me fantasize a little, and with your hang, it must be dressed as Buzz Aldrin dressed as an astronaut, an englishman, pin stripe suit, bowler hat, swinging an umbrella, or Tom Hanks lettting a german go.

I suspect you cant beat being dressed as a Gestapo offficer, peak capped with a deaths head. A doctor would be good, and a bit of a shock, as most Americans cant afford one, but the Duchess dressed as one might be as good.

And the website, me thinking that no one would be interested in a podgy mid thitires male, with ill fitting wigs, pink lipstick, trying to look sexy. Ha, how wrong is that, its before its time.

ATOMIC, your hair is beautiful, dooby dooby dooby, ATOMIC........... Blondie 1978. Thankyou Blue for taking the time to try and explain its appreciated, my home town is Cambridge not brum, iwent to uni in brum. Marks quips are beyond my culture and understanding, i need to take a course in alien languages like klingon.

Ching does turn my mind to dressing up, and wot i would do. Well, errr,,,,,,,,,. Anyway, getting naked with the Duchess would be good, i could remove your pistol and holster with my teeth. If you spoke german, that would set a tone, like tell me your information or i will give you a chinese burn.

In german. Then you get Sally Mirah, aussie friend and girl boss to hold me down while you kissed me all over, saying in german, speakund to me in fenlandia. And you all take turns before i become a fire hose, drenching the room.

I then flick a pound coin in your direction, and storm off saying Maddonna did better.

Ummm. Getting back to chingo, your fucked up mate, you dont know top from bottom.

(01-23-2023, 05:21 AM)Duchess Wrote:

(01-22-2023, 11:56 PM)sally Wrote: Well I don't understand it 100 percent, Dr. Ruth. Why does he fantasize about a sex change and male attention?Sounds pretty fucking gay if you ask me, but apparently you're the expert.

It looks like Clang has explained it well enough that even in your drunken, menopausal haze you should be able to understand it, if not, I'm sure Clang would take the time to walk you through it.  

I'd rather not walk her through it. I'd rather have a therapist help me better understand why I do what I do and then explain it to sally.