ARE YOU GOING TO GET LAID?

[Duchess]

Is sex in your weekend plans?

[SIXFOOTERsez]

Oh Hell Yes

[Clang McFly]

Is sex in your weekend plans?

Not unless I get accidentally groped in the dark theater while watching Guardians of the Galaxy 2 tonight.

[BigMark]

I got a pocket full of rubbers and my homies do too.

[sally]

This ass is getting pounded.

[sally]

I allow him to do it just to keep the peace since it pretty much looks like I'll be stuck with him for the rest of my life. He already said if I try to leave him he'll kill me. So... happy man, happy household. Plus I need a new vehicle and if I give a spectacular blow job he'll be all excited to go to the car dealership. If I don't do it he'll be all in a shitty mood. Like I said, it's to keep the peace.

[BigMark]

That's really sad.

[Clang McFly]

It may suck, butt it eventually will blow over.

Don't over anal-yze it.

[aussiefriend]

It's a sad sorry state of affairs! Or lack thereof in my case. Boo fucking hoo.

[Duchess]

Do y'all care if you get woke up for sex?

Somehow I doubt that men do but I shouldn't be assuming so...

[Midwest Spy]

Do y'all care if you get woke up for sex?

Somehow I doubt that men do but I shouldn't be assuming so...

Well, Clang would be happy if BigMark was waking him up, but not so sure Mark would feel the same if Clang was doing the waking.

[Duchess]

That's really sad.

She's not the first woman I've seen say something like that. It's happening across America even as I type this.

[BigMark]

I meant sad for me, I bought my wife a seqouia last year and was apparently not compensated correctly.

[Duchess]

You poor bastard.

March right on into where ever she is right now and demand what you are owed. Do it, do it now.

[sally]

I meant sad for me, I bought my wife a seqouia last year and was apparently not compensated correctly.

[Duchess]

You can only imagine how well Sally had to perform for a Denali.

[aussiefriend]

Do y'all care if you get woke up for sex?

Somehow I doubt that men do but I shouldn't be assuming so...

If your pardner is gay, I dare say waking them up for sex will not necessarily end with a game-set-match type situation.

[Duchess]

I don't like my sleep fucked with. I can turn crabby in a nanosecond. Grrr

[QueenBee]

He was a very happy man. He had been dating his lovely girlfriend for over a year, and so they decided to get married. There was only one little thing bothering him. It was her beautiful younger sister.
His prospective sister-in-law was twenty-two, wore very tight miniskirts, and generally was bra-less. She would regularly bend down when she was near him, and he always got more than a nice view. It had to be deliberate. Because she never did it when she was near anyone else.
One day her ‘little’ sister called and asked him to come over to check the wedding invitations. She was alone when he arrived, and she whispered to him that she had feelings and desires for him that she couldn’t overcome. She told him that she wanted him just once before he got married and committed his life to her sister.
Well, he was in total shock, and couldn’t say a word. She said, “I’m going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want one last wild fling, just come up and get me.”
He was stunned and frozen in shock as he watched her go up the stairs. He stood there for a moment, then turned and made a beeline straight to the front door. He opened the door, and headed straight towards his car. Lo… and behold, his entire future family was standing outside, all clapping!
With tears in his eyes, his future father-in-law hugged him and said, ‘We are very happy that you have passed our little test. We couldn’t ask for a better man for our daughter… Welcome to the family.’
And the moral of this story is:
ALWAYS KEEP YOUR CONDOMS IN YOUR CAR!!!

[Clang McFly]