Dear Maggot MD

[Ma Huang Sor]

Fuck that! He's obviously with another patient.

Have you tried an adjustable wrench?

If it's a plastic bottle, you could always stab it and collect the liquid in another container. Has a certain satanic appeal to me.

At least someone gets the sincere seriousness of my dilemna. Thank you, user.

I think stabbing it and bleeding it out may be an option. Before I take such drastic measures, I will consult with my psychiatrist as it's not of the utmost urgency; I can wait a bit longer. I've been putting up with the failure to put out for a few weeks now. If Maggot doesn't respond shortly, I will try your extreme solution.

@ramseycat: thank you for your sage advice. Unfortunately, it has been attempted and failed. If fear that only Maggot holds the answers.

Edit: @user: even a wrench didn't work. I kid you not. It's cracking me up.

wellthen. Do. Not. Be. Fooled.