THE MOCK CONFESSIONAL

[HairOfTheDog]

It said I was only allowed 10,000 characters.

Recommended penance:

A gradual approach is required.

Rank your transgressions over the last 24 hours in order of impurity. Post only the most lacivious first.

It's a stretch, but it's possible that you may be able to do so in 10,000 characters or less. Spiritual guidance patiently awaits you...

No? still 22 thousand characters.

Narrowing the scope is the next option.

Try ranking your transgressions over the last 4 hours only. Post only the most lacivious first.

If you're still unable to post a list in 10,000 characters or less, an exorcism will likely be required. Don't be scared, some people live to tell.