THE SEXIEST NIGHT ON TELEVISION

[Midwest Spy]

Call me crazy, but most of the Victoria models are too skinny for my personal liking.

I imagine they wouldn't admire your love handles either.

Let's not stop there:

We can include my propensity for farting at the most inopportune times, my flat feet, my too graying hair, ugly toes and perpetual halitosis.

Yes, it's a mutual dislike.