hypothetical: calling all evil vagina monsters

[Donovan]

It has been strained. EVA is having some trust issues given that Jonovan lied to her about visiting the ex, even though he swears no hanky panky went on. Sex is sparse and unsatisfying.

Now that we know you are really Eva in the story, this is really fucked up. I've heard about women not giving up the pussy when they get mad, but holding back the dick regularly? You must get blue balls like a motherfucker.

It's not really a revenge thing, I don't do that. But part of the messed up wiring in my head is what best can be described as emotional lockdown. I can turn if off and slam a brick wall into place like nobody's business. No one is ever quite prepared for it. But it shuts down ALL emotional reactive stuff, and I can't really turn it back on. Hence the frequent descriptions of being a cold blooded bastard. Ever been just letting loose on somebody, screaming and crying and snot bubbles and throwing shit, and have them just shrug at you, or worse, laugh? Yeah that's what it's like trying to get a rise out of me. And before Sally chimes in with humble brag accusations, I consider this defense mechanism to be my single greatest and scariest flaw. Among many.