M O C K News at 5 starts now .

[F.U.]

~[ Insert sound of typewriter franticly typing away ] ~

Hello , and welcome to yourweekly edition of,
the Sunday 5 pm CST Mock news .
Where its the news that matters , Notthe grammar.

This is your News anchor Mr Pumpkin Ass reporting the Mock news , sports and weather .
Reporting on the stories that I want . The way I want .



We start this edition with a story we have ben covering for you all day here at Mock news .

After some debate as to the exact intent of a comment made by our own Mr Liquid . It was determined that " Sarcasm " was the desired effect . However most that witnessed his attempt agreed it missed the mark a bit .
And previous reports of a possibleattempted Mocking by Mr Liquid using Wit , Insults and name calling have also ben discredited . Repeat thereshpuld be NO attempted useof these tactics by Mr Liquid in a mock .


Now M O C K News would like to welcome our newest Mocker. Lets give a warm welcome to #@*! .

[ insert applause here ]

Congratulations #@*! for holding up to the tortures of our own sick little version of " Newbie Hell "
After an initial lock out . And your surprising return you finally made it . You took some pretty good blows there #@*! . But you stood right back up and dished it out . Good For You .
Now that you have gained " full access " #@*! I see that you have jumped right in and started slinging mud . I hope you continue the " hate and discontent "
Well we at M O C Knews would like to say Thank you #@*! for your participation at Mock forums .
Now have a good night . And drive carefully .

Bruno show #@*! the way to the door .




Our next story comes from the... Ass holes In The News section of our forum . And was started by our own MR M.F. .

First it was Paper or Plastic . Now the big debate is ... Hot Dog , WITH or WITHOUT 4 legs . It appears that there is a heated debate going on amongst members as to weather it is morally correct to eat our beloved weinerdogs and other 4 legged friends .
There are many apposed to this concept of devouring the family pet . But there still area few that would prefer to raise them , and then grill them .
We will need to wait to find out the actual outcome of this debateas it is ongoing .






And from our -Discussions, Opinions & Debate Section of our Forum we see ,
posted by our local law woman jackboots .
We find alink describing the enormous size of the bloomers once worn by A Queen .
It seams that the knickers have a 50in (127cm) waist and date from the 1890s .These knickerswere worn by Queen Victoria .
Theresize made themsuitable for use in the tent makingindustry. We will keep you informed as to exactly how many boy scout tents will actually be made from this pair of undies .




~[ cue the marching band ]~

Now we turn to the sports section of our broadcast .

This week in the NFL it appearedthat there is curdled cheese in cheese land .
The Green Bay Packers have given Brett Fare the finger when it comes to his return to football .
After retiring last year crying like a baby, he has now " changed his mind " . Now wanting to come back to the game he loved . But this time as a Chicago Bear . Well GB"s organization says"OH No " Your under OUR contract yet . You will sit on our bench or No bench at all .
Some fans say ... smart move and some disagree .
Only time will tell who is correct .



Let's turn gears and our attention to today's weather .

Today's weather is brought to you by M O C K Firearms . ..

Were at M O C K Firearms we say " Never bring a knife to a gun fight "

And M O C K ammunition . M O C K ... the definition of accuracy .


Now lets take a look at our weather map ...


Hum ????

What the ??????