I'm feeling....

[ramseycat]

bitchy today. People are annoying me. It's pouring out. If like to just go to bed and wake up to a new day. I'm done with this one.

[HairOfTheDog]

Some recommended tools to help relieve that bitchy feeling, ramsey.

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

You can use them in combination if you're feeling extra bitchy (probably not a good idea for #2 and #3 though).

[SIXFOOTERsez]

The vibrator should do it

[sally]

It looks like you want Ramsey to burn in hell. Are there any other cardinal sins you'd like to add, HotD?

[ramseycat]

I'll start with #1. Then have some #5. I have my own #4. The one in the picture is a little intimidating.

[Maggot]

Try throwing out something that doesn't belong to you.
I have 2 dead dragon flies sitting on my computer and people just cannot resist putting them in sexual positions. One of the girls put them in a blowjob position, a truck driver put them in a doggy style position and another dipshit just put them in a 69 position. There has gotta be some Freudian resoning for this crap. So if you are bitchy I bet sex has some mysterious play within your mind that is playing with you. Try some heating oil, the more you rub the hotter it gets. rubba dub dubby some fun in the tubby eh?

[ramseycat]

Try throwing out something that doesn't belong to you.

Yea see the problem with that is one of the Things will suddenly need that item I threw out. Even though they haven't used it in 852 years. Then a scene ensues and I end up feeling even more bitchy.

[FAHQTOO]

Try throwing out something that doesn't belong to you.

Yea see the problem with that is one of the Things will suddenly need that item I threw out. Even though they haven't used it in 852 years. Then a scene ensues and I end up feeling even more bitchy.

Or you could do what any normal mother would do and LIE about it. You have no knowledge of what happened to it...case closed.
See how easy that is?

[Duchess]

you could do what any normal mother would do and LIE about it.

[ramseycat]

Try throwing out something that doesn't belong to you.

Yea see the problem with that is one of the Things will suddenly need that item I threw out. Even though they haven't used it in 852 years. Then a scene ensues and I end up feeling even more bitchy.

Or you could do what any normal mother would do and LIE about it. You have no knowledge of what happened to it...case closed.
See how easy that is?

Lying about it doesn't lessen the reaction when Thing suddenly HAS to have that thingamajig. And did you know that the iPhone auto spells thingamajig?

[HairOfTheDog]

It looks like you want Ramsey to burn in hell. Are there any other cardinal sins you'd like to add, HotD?

There's more, but I'm saving the really juicy stuff in case she needs it later. Moving a full house is always a bitch.

Ramsey won't go to hell no matter what though.

Sin, ask for forgiveness, repent...clean slate. I think that's how it works.

[sally]

Sin, ask for forgiveness, repent...clean slate. I think that's how it works.

I think that only works when you regularly put money in the donation pot, which Ramsey hasn't done in a long time. Give her a vibrator and a gallon of ice cream and she's destined for hell.

The ice cream speaks for itself, we all know she's a big woman. The vibrator, well you know what she's thinking about with that.... that poor, young real estate agent that innocently told her that he liked her perfume that one time.

[ramseycat]

Jesus Sally. Are you always drunk? Of course I'm going to heaven. I regularly tithe. You don't gave to give money to go to heaven. And it was the dude at the unrmoyment office that liked my perfume. Put down the bottle and get with it.

[HairOfTheDog]

I'll take "Funky Phonics" for $500, Alex..


For 500, the answer is:
...it was the dude at the unrmoyment office that liked my perfume.


What is: Rams was eating a double-stuffed Oreo with no milk to wash it down when she typed that sentence, or she was doing her Scooby Doo impression?

[sally]

You don't gave to give money to go to heaven.

Well of course not, If you did that I don't even know what the fuck would happen. Jesus might walk on water or some shit.

[crash]

Ramsey, you didn't directly ask, I know, but inadvertently you did. And every piece of help you've been offered you've had a moan about. You, ma'am, are an askhole..

[Duchess]

Askhole. Hahaha!

[ramseycat]

Ramsey, you didn't directly ask, I know, but inadvertently you did. And every piece of help you've been offered you've had a moan about. You, ma'am, are an askhole..

Kiss. My. Ass.

[Duchess]

I like saying that. It ranks up there with fuck off, piss off, drop dead & eat shit and die.

[ramseycat]

I felt it was appropriate in this instance.