leaves

[Maggot]

I have a pile 4ft tall near my porch and might just stick my kid in it and have him jump out when my wife comes near it when she comes back from grocery shopping.

[Duchess]

Wild man.

My maples are still green & lush.

There is a dead coon in the road & 3 eagles are eating it, they fly/jump up onto the horse fence whenever a car is coming. I've tried like hell to find their nest, it shouldn't be this hard, it's as big as a queen mattress!

[Maggot]

There's a huge nest next to the R.R. tracks by the river but I haven't seen them in a few weeks. I wonder if they migrate.

[Duchess]

I wonder if they migrate.

According to a site I frequently visit in the Winter, no. I watch the Decorah eagles, there is a webcam on their nest. I became emotionally invested in the first eaglets I watched hatch, grow and fledge. I am never doing that again! I actually worried about them during a freak Spring snowstorm & shed a tear when the following year one was electrocuted. Jesus Christ.

[ramseycat]

Do you want to have sex tonight Maggot? Then don't scare the shit out of your wife.

[Maggot]

Do you want to have sex tonight Maggot? Then don't scare the shit out of your wife.

Funny you would say that, I'm heading to the adult shop this afternoon for some toys. And she wants to watch that new pirate porn movie later. AVAST!!!!!Arrrgggg MATEY!!

[username]

Do you want to have sex tonight Maggot? Then don't scare the shit out of your wife.

Funny you would say that, I'm heading to the adult shop this afternoon for some toys. And she wants to watch that new pirate porn movie later. AVAST!!!!!Arrrgggg MATEY!!

*fans self*

That's so much better than candles and a massage.

[username]

Do you want to have sex tonight Maggot? Then don't scare the shit out of your wife.

Funny you would say that, I'm heading to the adult shop this afternoon for some toys. And she wants to watch that new pirate porn movie later. AVAST!!!!!Arrrgggg MATEY!!

*fans self*

That's so much better than candles and a massage.

She's going to wank your plank, captain!

[Donovan]

What pirate porn movie? That is, not for me but for a friend.

[Maggot]

It's a good one with a script the porn industry tried their best with imagery and a story line. I also picked up a new monkey suit and natural doctor approved lubricant. You cannot skimp on the slippery stuff, and if she fits into the new suit I'm gonna be a lucky gringo considering the toys I procured at 50% off because I'm a smucking fart shopper.

[HairOfTheDog]

I also picked up a new monkey suit... and if she fits into the new suit I'm gonna be a lucky gringo...

Crazy man. Hope you got lucky and your wife went bananas for the suit.



P.s. That pirate porn movie must be a winner. Judging by her post attempts, username's timbers seem to have gone all a shiver at just the mention of it. Excitable sexy wench, that one...

[Duchess]

Is it okay to laugh during sex?

[crash]

From first hand experience; no. She got awfully pissed off.

[HairOfTheDog]

I think laughing is okay (hope so), some things tickle or are just plain fun.

Pointing and laughing is something to avoid though, I imagine.

[username]

From first hand experience; no. She got awfully pissed off.

Well, maybe she went ape shit on his ass then.

[crash]

You ever heard that joke;

What's the difference between your girlfriend and your fridge?

[Maggot]

I'll take "She is so cold when she crosses her legs the light goes out for 500.00 Alex"

[crash]

Haha..close, but no;

The fridge doesn't fart when you pull your meat out.

At the occurrence of some escaped air due to sexual activity, apparently it is not kosher to think of that joke and lol.