Todays morning idiot thread

[HairOfTheDog]

Doesn't everyone have mice in their truck?

Most of us do, I think.

In my truck, I've got 3 blind ones (also tail-less, little guys made the mistake of running after the farmer's wife).

BUT, today's morning idiot doesn't drive a truck. He drives a Corolla. No mice, but nice view of the glovebox from the driver's seat.

[Maggot]

I have a window on the passenger side that the motor broke on, so I disconnected the motor so the window was free and then took apart a clothes pin and wrapped it a few times with electrical tape. It's like a wedge near the lock and after going over enough bumps it jiggles down and a crack opens at the top of the window.
Last week it was nice and the window was open about 6" so when I went to lunch and went for a walk near the lake I came back and 2 chipmunks were snacking on the sandwich I left on the seat.
It was a peanut butter and apple jelly sandwich. I had to cut away the chunks they had eaten because I did not want chipmunk spit on my half.

[HairOfTheDog]

Thievin' little chipmunks.

I'm glad to hear that you didn't resort to murder (again). Can imagine you were tempted to grab those long feathered roach clips hanging from the rear view and chip clip their little jaws shut. But, you resisted the homicidal urges and opted for "live and let live" this time, and that is good.

You may have saved another great band from losing a key member (they're nothing without Theodore, who's rumored to demand peanut butter and apple jelly sandwiches at all tour venues).


Could it be a sign that you're on the righteous path to becoming a liberal who gladly feeds those unwilling to work for their own food; one who staunchly opposes the death penalty in all cases? Once you slap that Obama Hope/Change sticker on your clunker bumper, I'll have my answer.

(This thread feels like one of those walking mazes - I have no idea where the hell we're headed here - I'm just following the grinning guy in the green shirt and blue tie. )

[Blindgreed1]

I like the way Maggot thinks, only I'd leave the mice to hide wherever they wanted to so's he could see something moving out of the corner of his eye while driving.

Another warped mind at work!

I like it, in theory.

BUT, in reality, he probably couldn't keep his eyes off the mice and on the road and would wind up hitting a fire hydrant or some such shit (and then telling his mom on me).

Risky business.

Something tells me you could totally pull off the "yeah... I put mice in your car dude" and then look at mom with the crazy eyes and be done with it.

[Maggot]

I kinda wish some mama would do to me what that monkey is doing in your avatar.

[HairOfTheDog]

Something tells me you could totally pull off the "yeah... I put mice in your car dude" and then look at mom with the crazy eyes and be done with it.

Sorry, Gunnar, I don't think you're qualified to seek side employment as a seer at the Psychic Friends Network any more than I.

I can't roll my tongue. Can't wiggle my ears. Can't do one of those cool two-fingered "get your ass over here, now!" whistles. And, I look perfectly average and sane - can't really pull off the coveted crazy-eyed look either. I try not to think about my lack of talents too often and focus on the good things though.

I CAN walk really, really fast and laugh at the same time. So, even though the morning idiot's mom is like a ninja with her cane and walker, I think I could make a clean getaway, if required. I guess the feeder mice option is still on the table.

I kinda wish some mama would do to me what that monkey is doing in your avatar.

You want a mama to give you shit, or you want one who will just sit there and take your shit?

[Duchess]

I CAN walk really, really fast and laugh at the same time.

I can't. Well...I know I can't laugh & run at the same time. I know this because that's what happens when the geese chase me.

[Maggot]

Crap..........I thought that monkey was gently carresing the others nuts and bolts.