Posts: 37,639
Threads: 1,590
Joined: Jun 2008
If a giant EMP smacked into the earth. Just in case it does head to the nearest Amish EMP saving station but bring gold and silver, maybe a cow or some chickens.
If you're in California, head to the nearest hippie commune.
If you're in Florida make sure you have plenty of ammo
If its nighttime like 1-2 AM go to the shopping center with a truck and back into the glass windows and throw as much shit as you can in.
Fill the tub with water and ice .........put your beer in.........
This has been a public service message in praise of the Amish. 
He ain't heavy, he's my brother.
Posts: 86,866
Threads: 2,949
Joined: Jun 2008
(07-30-2014, 04:10 PM)Maggot Wrote: If a giant EMP smacked into the earth. Just in case it does head to the nearest Amish EMP saving station but bring gold and silver, maybe a cow or some chickens.
I'm good to go then! Yay!
They ain't gettin' any of my horses though, they think a horse is just a tool.
Posts: 86,866
Threads: 2,949
Joined: Jun 2008
Those women can cook like nobodies business. I've had quite a bit of their food and a couple weeks ago one of them sent a container or mac & cheese home. I hadn't had that from them before and I can totally understand why so many of the women are chunky. I wouldn't dare eat something like that more than a couple times a year. It was the best I've ever had.
Posts: 37,639
Threads: 1,590
Joined: Jun 2008
Fat is where all the flavor is.............just ask Sally.
He ain't heavy, he's my brother.
Posts: 1,792
Threads: 14
Joined: Mar 2011
(07-30-2014, 04:19 PM)Duchess Wrote: (07-30-2014, 04:10 PM)Maggot Wrote: If a giant EMP smacked into the earth. Just in case it does head to the nearest Amish EMP saving station but bring gold and silver, maybe a cow or some chickens.
I'm good to go then! Yay!
They ain't gettin' any of my horses though, they think a horse is just a tool.
They are so wrong! They are food too. 
Posts: 37,639
Threads: 1,590
Joined: Jun 2008
I think your pecker just lost an inch. 
He ain't heavy, he's my brother.
Posts: 37,639
Threads: 1,590
Joined: Jun 2008
How do the Amish view sex?
He ain't heavy, he's my brother.
Posts: 4,275
Threads: 39
Joined: Mar 2011
Posts: 86,866
Threads: 2,949
Joined: Jun 2008
(08-23-2015, 08:54 AM)Maggot Wrote: How do the Amish view sex?
They fuck like bunnies, most Amish families have a large number of kids. Some of the Amish men I have encountered are no different than a lot of what they call "English" men. I've had 'em look at me like I'm a cookie and they will make kiss noises as (some) women walk by.
Posts: 16,410
Threads: 3
Joined: Apr 2012
(08-23-2015, 10:15 AM)Duchess Wrote: (08-23-2015, 08:54 AM)Maggot Wrote: How do the Amish view sex? [size=medium][i]
They fuck like bunnies you would too if all you did all day was raising barns and churning butter.
Posts: 37,639
Threads: 1,590
Joined: Jun 2008
(08-23-2015, 09:38 AM)SIXFOOTERsez Wrote: No viewing allowed
Why not!!! 
He ain't heavy, he's my brother.
Posts: 3,299
Threads: 132
Joined: Jun 2008
Actually Maggot a EMP would effect the amish, or at least the amish here in Iowa. We have them in our shop all the time. The pull up in a truck, but have a non amish friend drive them. Come into the store and buy power tools. It is not against the amish religion, faith, or whatever you want to call it, to use electricity. However the power they use must be generated from "Gods Grid" [solar, wind, etc] or diesel generators. As I was looking around to see how common this is I did see a couple things I did not know. 1, If a amish person buys a non amish home they have up to a year that they can still use the public power as the convert that home. The said it takes time so during the change over it is forgiven. 2, If a amish rents a booth at , lets say a flee market or something, they can use the power that is in that building because they are renting and don't own it. 3, some amish even use 12v headlights, taillights and turn signals' on their buggies. Funny people they are.
Here is a link to one of the sites I was reading tidbits about them. http://amishamerica.com/do-amish-use-electricity/
Posts: 7,826
Threads: 74
Joined: Aug 2013
(08-23-2015, 09:38 AM)SIXFOOTERsez Wrote: No viewing allowed Actually, this isn't quite accurate. "Bundling" is a part of amish courtship and is often supervised. After the wedding, the first night the couple sleeps in the wife's parents home. The honeymoon consists of weekend visits to various other relatives homes where they also spend the night.
Posts: 37,639
Threads: 1,590
Joined: Jun 2008
The Amish sure seem horny as hell. I wonder what bedroom games they play.
He ain't heavy, he's my brother.
Posts: 5,214
Threads: 49
Joined: Mar 2012
Thank god I am oblivious to the opinions of others while caught in the blinding splendor of my own cleverness.
Posts: 26,231
Threads: 228
Joined: Dec 2008
That nigger had a fit over that one. Dick head couldn't take it instead of just laughing it off.
Posts: 5,214
Threads: 49
Joined: Mar 2012
Yeah well Al Yankovic messed around and had him a thirty year career out of singing silly parody songs and is more popular than ever. Where dafuq is Coolio? It ain't his style but I sincerely hope at least once he called Coolio up and went, "scoreboard, bitch."
Thank god I am oblivious to the opinions of others while caught in the blinding splendor of my own cleverness.
|
![[Image: Zy3rKpW.png]](https://i.imgur.com/Zy3rKpW.png)
