hypothetical: calling all evil vagina monsters

[Donovan]

That was how we did it last time and to her credit she was very good about letting me take him. I'm just not at all sure I can take the once a week shit of being her extra babysitter, jockeying for time with the no good parents, and wondering what kind of damage it's doing to him. He did not do well with me living in a different household last time.

[blueberryhill]

That was how we did it last time and to her credit she was very good about letting me take him. I'm just not at all sure I can take the once a week shit of being her extra babysitter, jockeying for time with the no good parents, and wondering what kind of damage it's doing to him. He did not do well with me living in a different household last time.

Although difficult to do, you need to try to take her out of the picture, try to jockey for time to be with the boy if you love and care for him. Otherwise, your toxic relationship with his mother will overflow into your time with him......Just enjoy him and do things you both enjoy and he will give you unconditional love....The household is not really relative in the equation, it just doesn't matter to a kid......he will feel the love....period....a win-win move.

[sally]

It has been strained. EVA is having some trust issues given that Jonovan lied to her about visiting the ex, even though he swears no hanky panky went on. Sex is sparse and unsatisfying.

Now that we know you are really Eva in the story, this is really fucked up. I've heard about women not giving up the pussy when they get mad, but holding back the dick regularly? You must get blue balls like a motherfucker.

[Love Child]

@Fahqtoo
If you or anyone else paid attention you would realize that Donovan did not go through this job change that he described, nor did he tell us about super hot girl-Because he would have!
I knew something was off about the story but I didn't know what!!!!!

@Dono please don't settle.

[FAHQTOO]

@Fahqtoo
If you or anyone else paid attention you would realize that Donovan did not go through this job change that he described, nor did he tell us about super hot girl-Because he would have!
I knew something was off about the story but I didn't know what!!!!!

@Dono please don't settle.

If you were paying attention, you would have realized several posts ago that we already came to the conclusion that some of us weren't paying attention. Thanks for the reminder anyways.

[Donovan]

It has been strained. EVA is having some trust issues given that Jonovan lied to her about visiting the ex, even though he swears no hanky panky went on. Sex is sparse and unsatisfying.

Now that we know you are really Eva in the story, this is really fucked up. I've heard about women not giving up the pussy when they get mad, but holding back the dick regularly? You must get blue balls like a motherfucker.

It's not really a revenge thing, I don't do that. But part of the messed up wiring in my head is what best can be described as emotional lockdown. I can turn if off and slam a brick wall into place like nobody's business. No one is ever quite prepared for it. But it shuts down ALL emotional reactive stuff, and I can't really turn it back on. Hence the frequent descriptions of being a cold blooded bastard. Ever been just letting loose on somebody, screaming and crying and snot bubbles and throwing shit, and have them just shrug at you, or worse, laugh? Yeah that's what it's like trying to get a rise out of me. And before Sally chimes in with humble brag accusations, I consider this defense mechanism to be my single greatest and scariest flaw. Among many.

[Blindgreed1]

It has been strained. EVA is having some trust issues given that Jonovan lied to her about visiting the ex, even though he swears no hanky panky went on. Sex is sparse and unsatisfying.

Now that we know you are really Eva in the story, this is really fucked up. I've heard about women not giving up the pussy when they get mad, but holding back the dick regularly? You must get blue balls like a motherfucker.

It's not really a revenge thing, I don't do that. But part of the messed up wiring in my head is what best can be described as emotional lockdown. I can turn if off and slam a brick wall into place like nobody's business. No one is ever quite prepared for it. But it shuts down ALL emotional reactive stuff, and I can't really turn it back on. Hence the frequent descriptions of being a cold blooded bastard. Ever been just letting loose on somebody, screaming and crying and snot bubbles and throwing shit, and have them just shrug at you, or worse, laugh? Yeah that's what it's like trying to get a rise out of me. And before Sally chimes in with humble brag accusations, I consider this defense mechanism to be my single greatest and scariest flaw. Among many.

You're going to make a great ex-husband some day Dono.

[Donovan]

That was how we did it last time and to her credit she was very good about letting me take him. I'm just not at all sure I can take the once a week shit of being her extra babysitter, jockeying for time with the no good parents, and wondering what kind of damage it's doing to him. He did not do well with me living in a different household last time.

Although difficult to do, you need to try to take her out of the picture, try to jockey for time to be with the boy if you love and care for him. Otherwise, your toxic relationship with his mother will overflow into your time with him......Just enjoy him and do things you both enjoy and he will give you unconditional love....The household is not really relative in the equation, it just doesn't matter to a kid......he will feel the love....period....a win-win move.

Yeah this would be the best way. But like I said, kid has already been abandoned by mommy and daddy and is beginning to notice. As the primary daddy figure in his life, but with zero legal power, I don't have a say in any part of what she does or does not choose to let happen. I've been through this rodeo before. One of the hazards of getting too attached to other people's kids.

[Love Child]

@Fahqtoo
If you or anyone else paid attention you would realize that Donovan did not go through this job change that he described, nor did he tell us about super hot girl-Because he would have!
I knew something was off about the story but I didn't know what!!!!!

@Dono please don't settle.

If you were paying attention, you would have realized several posts ago that we already came to the conclusion that some of us weren't paying attention. Thanks for the reminder anyways.

Well I don't have the opportunity to post throughout the day as some of you do. You were still calling him an asshole and a liar on page 4 so I assumed you were not over it yet.

[Donovan]

You're going to make a great ex-husband some day Dono.

Been there, done that. Where do you think I got such a detailed list of how fucked up I am? Lawyers hired by ex-wife can be very explicit. And thorough. I found out I did shit even I didn't know I did. Hell, by the end even I wanted to divorce me.

[Donovan]

Don't worry, Lovechild, that's how FQ2 says she likes a boy. Its like shooting rubber bands or pulling pigtails or something back in elementary school.

[Blindgreed1]

You're going to make a great ex-husband some day Dono.

Been there, done that. Where do you think I got such a detailed list of how fucked up I am? Lawyers hired by ex-wife can be very explicit. And thorough. I found out I did shit even I didn't know I did. Hell, by the end even I wanted to divorce me.

Some cats walk alone Dono.

[Donovan]

I get it. But damn if people don't throw a lot of shoes every time I try to sing.

[FAHQTOO]

@Fahqtoo
If you or anyone else paid attention you would realize that Donovan did not go through this job change that he described, nor did he tell us about super hot girl-Because he would have!
I knew something was off about the story but I didn't know what!!!!!

@Dono please don't settle.

If you were paying attention, you would have realized several posts ago that we already came to the conclusion that some of us weren't paying attention. Thanks for the reminder anyways.

Well I don't have the opportunity to post throughout the day as some of you do. You were still calling him an asshole and a liar on page 4 so I assumed you were not over it yet.

Asshole is my new name for him, until I get tired of it. Just like I've called Aussie Crazy Lady for years. It's a term of endearment, Mock style.

[Donovan]

I will wear it with pride. It rolls off the tongue better than couch cushion coin diver.

[Duchess]

kid has already been abandoned by mommy and daddy and is beginning to notice. As the primary daddy figure in his life, but with zero legal power, I don't have a say in any part of what she does or does not choose to let happen. I've been through this rodeo before. One of the hazards of getting too attached to other people's kids.

Donovan, she loves her grandchild and will want what's best for him and right now that is not losing you. Surely she will allow you time with the little one. I would imagine that he views your son in a big brother kinda way and that can be considered a loss as well. It would be nice if you and your son can continue to spend time with him even if it's a day spent eating and watching sports or playing games. It doesn't matter what you do, simply that he sees you as being available. I'm not telling you anything you don't already know.

[Donovan]

My son already checked out last time. He was supportive of our attempt to reconcile but his heart wasn't in the same place. I don't think he really ever forgave her for shit she said to him in anger. He's a lot like me.

[Duchess]

I don't think he really ever forgave her for shit she said to him in anger.

Not cool of her to speak to your son with that kind of tone!

[FAHQTOO]

If I had said my name was involved, the answers would have been biased based on prejudice for or against me. It wouldn't have been " who is correct?" but "does Donovan deserve this."

And if I had left the genders reversed, there was a real possibility of gender bias, as the females of the species tend to support one another against the evils of big stinky men. The scientific term for such an arbitrary grouping is "gaggle of bitches."

I wanted honest opinions not on whether I was right, but on whether I was overreacting to the conditions set forth. In case you people haven't noticed, I need very little encouragement in deciding whether I am right. And even less vocal support.

The actual real reason I needed input is that my obvious decision is to leave, again, and not look back. But there is a five year old boy I love to death who will be crushed when that happens, and since he is no official kin to me my leaving will be effectively ending our relationship as well.

For good.

That puts a hell of a different spin on things. Little dude is special to me more than anybody next to my own boy, but the hard fact is she and I can't stay friends after this. Not this way. So I have to be sure, be DAMN sure, that I am not over reacting or letting irrational jealousy fire my feelings.

Does that make sense to anyone?

I'm not sure if I've ever commented on any of your chicken threads, but I haven't ever seen the women in here gang up together on a serious topic like this just because we're women. I hate that shit, and my guess is most of the others do too. I can't see anyone telling you they're happy you got shit on because they think you deserve it either.
What I have seen is most of the women who normally reply to these kinds of posts coddling you (for lack of a better word) or saying things to make you feel better, giving advice, opinions or whatever...

Since you questioned my maturity up thread, how about we question yours.
Next time you have an issue to bring up you want opinions on, how about just putting it out there like you always have and keep the "hypothetical" bullshit out of it. You're on a forum where you take your chances of any replies you might get, like it or not.

[Duchess]

I knew better than to comment on the original post. I felt a jedi mindfuck comin' on.