COULD YOU HANDLE IT?

[Duchess]

You've just discovered your child is gay. Can you imagine your reaction? Would it be difficult for you to accept? Could you accept it?

[Blindgreed1]

You've just discovered your child is gay. Can you imagine your reaction? Would it be difficult for you to accept? Could you accept it?

Totally. I've thought about it many times over the last 28 years. No it wouldn't be difficult to accept. If my kid is happy, i'm happy.

[QueenBee]

I am not a parent..but have a niece who is gay. Took her a while to come out. But I was more than fine. In fact, she felt safest coming out to me as she knew I would be OK. I have not been thrilled about some of her choices in partners, but that is it

[OnBendedKnee]

Sometimes I think I'd prefer it.

[sally]

Well I wouldn't jump for joy or anything, but I'd accept it.

[ramseycat]

It is what it is. As long as my child is happy, I don't care.

[Donovan]

I'm good with whatever my boy decides to do with himself, it's his life to lead and I will be the first one in line to thump a motherfucker dares to give him grief over it.

[Midwest Spy]

I know I cringe when I see Magic's kid, and yes, if either of my sons were flaming like that it would be tough to take, but, I'd figure a way to suck it up and still love them.

I couldn't ever see my daughter as a butch lesbian (lipstick maybe) but, for whatever reason, that'd be easier for me to handle.

[blueberryhill]

Well, first I would scream and yell, because I would, selfishly put myself first and bemoan the fact that I wasn't going to have grandchildren........then I would calm down and realize that this is a genetic thing, and after a lot of self-loathing and guilt for passing some ancestor's gay gene to him/her, I would just love him/her and probably hold them a little closer because of all the difficulties I know they are going to have ahead with being judged, etc....It is not an easy road for gays/lesbians.......or anyone who is different, actually......end of lecture.......

[crash]

and bemoan the fact that I wasn't going to have grandchildren......

Yeah..because no gay couple ever had kids

fmg..

[Love Child]

then I would calm down and realize that this is a genetic thing, and after a lot of self-loathing and guilt for passing some ancestor's gay gene to him/her, I would just love him/her and probably hold them a little closer because of all the difficulties I know they are going to have ahead with being judged, etc....

What crash said-and why guilt? As if being gay were a bad thing or wrong. I wonder who is going to do the judging in this situation.

[blueberryhill]

then I would calm down and realize that this is a genetic thing, and after a lot of self-loathing and guilt for passing some ancestor's gay gene to him/her, I would just love him/her and probably hold them a little closer because of all the difficulties I know they are going to have ahead with being judged, etc....

What crash said-and why guilt? As if being gay were a bad thing or wrong. I wonder who is going to do the judging in this situation.

Let's see if I can explain this to you.......I grew up thinking I was guilty of everything which happened in my life. If you read any of my posts, you would know I am a strong supporter of LGBT community. I was a counselor for 19 years and personally had to deal with the problems they faced, the judgments, the hate, etc....and one suicide.....They were not accepted like they are today, but in any case, as a parent, I wouldn't wish that on anyone, let alone, a child of mine.......so it would be a natural reaction for a parent not to want a child to have to suffer and be called queer, fag, be discriminated against, etc............I had to deal with it IRL.......thus, because I blame myself for everything negative which happens in the World, I would blame "my" gene for making my child's life a difficult one.....I also have beat myself up for passing the cancer gene to my kids and grand kids....don't know if you get my drift, but there it is......You won't find a bigger proponent for equal rights for everyone than myself......this is a common reaction for parents of gays/lesbians and has nothing to do with not loving them if you believe that this is not a choice, but a genetic issue.......

Crash, OMG, you may think it is an easy process for gay couples to adopt. Trust me it is not....have you ever been involved in helping gay couples to adopt....they are still discriminated against, and you have to find a surrogate mother, it is very expensive and most couples just can't do that......

I am beginning to think that this is no longer Mock, but just another place to criticize what others feel, so pardon me, for trying to write my true feelings.....I will still feel like what I stated above if my child or grandchild told me he/she were gay.....then like i said, I would hold them a little closer to my heart because I know all the crap they will have to face throughout their lives.

[sally]

and bemoan the fact that I wasn't going to have grandchildren......

Yeah..because no gay couple ever had kids

fmg..

Yeah adopted or artificially inseminated. She wants a real grandchild, not some little bastard from Ethiopia or a test tube.

[Donovan]

Honest feelings are honest. But the thing Blueberry hill spoke about are the very things that make me understand if my son came out as gay it wouldn't be because he chose it, it would be because it was what he was. There is still plenty of mindless unreasoning hate in the world for something that is no one else's concern. People targeted or beaten or vilified or even killed for just the suspicion of being gay. I'll be damned if my son or anyone's is going to see my voice added to those others he will face. I prefer to be the proud father standing next to him daring the first son of a bitch to go ahead and say something. See what happens.

[blueberryhill]

Honest feelings are honest. But the thing Blueberry hill spoke about are the very things that make me understand if my son came out as gay it wouldn't be because he chose it, it would be because it was what he was. There is still plenty of mindless unreasoning hate in the world for something that is no one else's concern. People targeted or beaten or vilified or even killed for just the suspicion of being gay. I'll be damned if my son or anyone's is going to see my voice added to those others he will face. I prefer to be the proud father standing next to him daring the first son of a bitch to go ahead and say something. See what happens.

I am happy that u feel this way....more people should...

My disclaimer in my comment says, I selfishly would do the following......I am quite aware of what I said and I stand by every word.....it was not a putdown, a discriminatory remark, or anything else, but my own selfish feelings which I stated. Get over it..... although you see yourself as the savior of all mankind......you do understand that being gay is not a choice, don't you? You have me all confused and you shouldn't confuse ole' ladies......O.K. you are a better person than me.....and....does that make you happy, now?

Sally, you are right on point. Again selfishly, I want a blood grandchild.....but wait, I do have 6 grandchildren and another one due in Sep.......but, even if gay or lesbian couples use their own eggs/sperm, the other partner has to legally adopt the child born into this union. I didn't know we were going to get so fucking analytical. You can be my legal assistant, o.k.? I am going to have to confer with a book on law before I ever make another comment.......

[sally]

Don't mind those sanctimonious assholes up in here, I know what you meant BH. I bet they'd also prefer their kids not to be flaming homos.

[Donovan]

I wasn't trying to insult you BBH, your feelings were what they were. I was answering more of the original question and clarifying my position. Sally, of course, is completely wrong but she's pretty used to that by now.

[Duchess]

People have a right to their sexuality and they shouldn't have to live in fear of claiming it.

[Donovan]

And now we have the Florida shooting and the LA attempt to drive the point home with a sledgehammer.

[Love Child]

I was just seeking clarification BBH.