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A condom that rates your performance. What do you think, gentlemen?
The world's first 'smart condom' which rates a man's sexual performances and can detect STIs has been created by scientists.
The i-Con Smart Condom is billed as the newest form of wearable technology in the ever-growing market.
Providing a range of statistics, including duration, speed and girth measurements, male users are able to assess their sexual prowess.
The device also records the amount of calories burnt, different positions and can detect chlamydia and syphilis.
Story
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Do we really want condoms to be smarter than the person using them? It opens up a Pandora's box of technical voodoo.
He ain't heavy, he's my brother.
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There's only one stat that counts:
Was I hard enough, for a long enough time, to send my gal into back-arching, nail-grinding mode.
She don't need no smart condom to figure THAT out.
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It would kind of put a damper on it to detect STD's during sex, don't ya think?
Jesus Christ, you got the clap! I think I'll just be leaving now while praying that smart condom didn't have a hole in it.
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These smart condoms are dumb.
Nothing like adding more performance pressure to really spice things up.
And, I can just see some men disputing the results and wanting to do it again right away to try for better scores. Screw that.
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Luckily I don't need to worry about a smart condom. At the rate I'm going I'll be lucky if I get to use a regular condom.
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What if your condom gets hacked? How secure are the IDs on these things? I swear, that wasn't my dick!
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(03-02-2017, 07:03 PM)SIXFOOTERsez Wrote: What if your condom gets hacked? How secure are the IDs on these things? I swear, that wasn't my dick!
Hey! Today is your Mock anniversary. Six years!
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(03-02-2017, 07:03 PM)SIXFOOTERsez Wrote: What if your condom gets hacked? How secure are the IDs on these things? I swear, that wasn't my dick!
Happy sixth anniversary, Six.
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Agree with HotD, (can't believe I said that) These Smart Condoms are DUMB! 
They can put them all in the Edsel!
Carsman: Loves Living Large
Home is where you're treated the best, but complain the most!
Life is short, make the most of it, get outta here!
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Hey! You agree with me plenty and you know it, Cars.
I agree with you sometimes too.
But, it is good to see you openly admitting it for a change (even if it is only about dumb smart condoms). 
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A smart one would make you think about baseball at the right time.
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My 'go to' stat was Jack Morris' ERA during his years with the Tigers (even though I'm a Twins fan).
He had some good seasons from '84-'88, and being a native of St Paul who eventually pitched a 10 inning masterpiece in Game 7 of the 1991 WS, he bacame I guy I could turn my thoughts toward when things were about to 'get away from me.'
lol
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Getting hacked in the dick department sounds bad.
He ain't heavy, he's my brother.
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(03-02-2017, 09:07 PM)Midwest Spy Wrote: My 'go to' stat was Jack Morris' ERA during his years with the Tigers (even though I'm a Twins fan).
He had some good seasons from '84-'88, and being a native of St Paul who eventually pitched a 10 inning masterpiece in Game 7 of the 1991 WS, he bacame I guy I could turn my thoughts toward when things were about to 'get away from me.'
lol
I think about Charles Krauthammer.
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(03-02-2017, 10:00 PM)sally Wrote: (03-02-2017, 09:07 PM)Midwest Spy Wrote: My 'go to' stat was Jack Morris' ERA during his years with the Tigers (even though I'm a Twins fan).
He had some good seasons from '84-'88, and being a native of St Paul who eventually pitched a 10 inning masterpiece in Game 7 of the 1991 WS, he bacame I guy I could turn my thoughts toward when things were about to 'get away from me.'
lol
I think about Charles Krauthammer.
Who'd he play for?
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Wow, six years! Whoda thunk it?
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Condoms in general are a turn off and a smart condom isn't something I'd ever be interested in. I feel certain he'd be able to know what kind of job he was doing without me ever saying a word.
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