Trust

[MirahM]

Do you trust people right away and then disregard them when they let you down?

Or do you observe them first and then decide if they are trust worthy?

When people let you down how do you respond?

When you let people down how do you respond and hope others respond?

If someone does something to lose your trust will it regain again over time or are they lost to you forever?

[BigMark]

Here we go again, another night of being bumped
I'll keep to myself, avoid the sun, and cancel plans with everyone I know
'Cause it's just how it always ends, our bond will break
'Cause you can't relate to anyone, to anything at all
You brought your worst, and I'm right here
No, I've seen it all, and it's never been so clear
You're not the person that I knew back then
It's all too late to set things right 'cause everything has been
You're not the person that I knew back then
Let's try and act like this didn't happen
Follow your friends, like you ever had them
You still know me, still not cut out for this sort of thing
Never wanna be caught in between, I need constant reminders of everything
So what? It's who I am, I played it off so well
I just hold it in no matter how I've been, so nobody, nobody can tell
You brought your worst, and I'm right here
No, I've seen it all, and it's never been so clear
You're not the person that I knew back then
It's all too late to set things right 'cause everything has been
You're not the person that I knew back then
Let's try and act like this didn't happen
Follow your friends, like you ever had them
I won't sleep till the break of dawn (Break of dawn)
Can't let our problems find me here
So everybody, come on
You brought your worst, and I'm right here
I've seen it all, and it's never been so clear
You're not the person that I knew back then
It's all too late to set things right 'cause everything has been
You're not the person that I knew back then
Let's try and act like this didn't happen
Follow your friends, like you ever had them
You're not the person that I knew back then
It's all too late to set things right 'cause everything has been
You're not the person that I knew back then
Let's try and act like this didn't happen
Follow your friends, like you ever had them

[rothschild]

Observation is the key. When all you can see is what you want to see, you're going to attract predators.

[Duchess]

The most I have to say about this is that with age, comes wisdom, at least for me anyway.

[MirahM]

There was a lady here who had this guy doing work for her and she just raved about him. I had a feeling about him and observed him and how he interacted with others. Now the lady is complaining about him. (Of course she complains about most people at some point anyway-so I keep her at a distance too!)

[aussiefriend]

Now I'm an old Aussiebitch, if you break my trust, very hard for me to unfeel, unsee or unhear that. Everything changes.

I don't trust my sister as far as I could throw her. I have cut her out of my life, I hate that. I miss my sister. I miss my family but you are stupid if you let people into your life when you have acquired knowledge that these people are hurting your life and want your ruin. My sister is jealous of me and out to destroy me. I can't allow that. I hate that this is the reality, but that's what's happening.

[Duchess]

I don't trust my sister as far as I could throw her. 

Man. I remember how she was when you were taking care of your mom and later after your mom's death.

[MirahM]

Observation is the key. When all you can see is what you want to see, you're going to attract predators.

Yes, one should observe a company before going to jump out of an airplane with them.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h3hMnJd4W-E

[username]

Do you trust people right away and then disregard them when they let you down?

Or do you observe them first and then decide if they are trust worthy?

When people let you down how do you respond?

When you let people down how do you respond and hope others respond?

If someone does something to lose your trust will it regain again over time or are they lost to you forever?

I don’t trust people right away with any of what I perceive as vulnerabilities so I don’t have to be concerned about them “right away” letting me down. Trust, like respect, is earned IMO. So yes to question 2, I observe first.

If I give my trust to someone and they “let me down” I get possibly more angry at myself for my mistaken judgment than them but good luck to the person who lets me down and hopes to regain my trust/friendship. Probably won’t ever be the same.

I try very hard to be trustworthy and I think I do pretty well in that regard. My adult kids tell me everything (and I mean EVERYTHING) and often, whether they say it explicitly or not, I know that they don’t necessarily want me to share their experiences with my husband. 98% of the time I don’t but there have been a couple instances where I felt like he had a need-to-know basis as their father and I knew he would only react with love and concern (or say nothing if I told him he couldn’t which is a heavy cross to bare). Anyway, I’ve told my kids on those few occasions that I told their dad. I apologized but said the obvious in those instances: he loves u as much as I do and there’s no judgment. So far that’s worked out and neither has been angry that I’ve “betrayed a trust”. Usually it’s around 3 months later so whatever the issue was it’s not as intense by that time and my husband is good about letting them talk to him if they choose.

As far as me cutting someone off “forever” if they betray a trust, it really depends on the particular circumstances and timing. I’ve been married 30 years now.If I found out my husband had a hot one night stand with some woman he met in a hotel 20 years ago I truly wouldn’t give a shit at this point. 

[Carsman]

Now I'm an old Aussiebitch, if you break my trust, very hard for me to unfeel, unsee or unhear that. Everything changes.

I don't trust my sister as far as I could throw her. I have cut her out of my life, I hate that. I miss my sister. I miss my family but you are stupid if you let people into your life when you have acquired knowledge that these people are hurting your life and want your ruin. My sister is jealous of me and out to destroy me. I can't allow that. I hate that this is the reality, but that's what's happening.

I had a sister that is a witch bitch that I had to cut her out of my life also!  I don't miss her at all, she is pure vindictive evil through and through. 
Oddly enough, She actually introduced me to my wife. After time she saw how happy my wife and I were, instead of being happy for us, my sister became venomously jealous of my wife  and I, and continually tried to create a wedge between us! The witch bitch ruined many events, parties, and family get to gathers, until I cut her out of our lives. 

[BigMark]

My nephew was three hours late to a party at his house and was almost Two hours late to Thanksgiving at our house and admitted it was partly because he stopped at jack in the box, our food was the bomb!

[username]

My nephew was three hours late to a party at his house and was almost Two hours late to Thanksgiving at our house and admitted it was partly because he stopped at jack in the box, our food was the bomb!

You know he’s fucking somebody at or near the Jack in the Box, right? Or getting stoned out of his mind.

2 to 3 hours late? C’mon!! Kids today don’t know how to lie. I was a couple hours late to a family event and told my parents I was briefly abducted/almost raped by “some guys in a van”. Thank gawd (and luckily for every Latino male in the area) I convinced them not to call the police over it.