M O C K News at 5 Sunday July 27 , 2008 .

[F.U.]

~[ Insert sound of typewriter franticly typing away] ~

Hello , and welcome to yourweekly edition of,
the Sunday 5 pm CST Mock news .
Where its the news that matters , Notthe grammar.

This is your News anchor Mr Pumpkin Ass reporting the Mock news , sports and weather .
Reporting on the stories that I want . The way I want .



I would like to start this weeks edition out with a thread that has ben on going for almost 3 weeks now . It is posted in the Assholes in the news section of our forum . And comes to us from across the pond ,from the one we all love to hate . None other than thebritish butt bandit, Mr oversized poophole.

** insert Boo machine noises here **

America Not so super , superpower .

Thischoice of thread tittles was sure to enrage many of the local Mock regularsand did not disappoint .
This thread is chocked full of insults and stereotyping like ...
Quote ...his welfare check thing was a great example of just how fucking stupid he is willing to be to slam America while exposing his anti-freedom socialist PC liberal monkey core. Said MR M.F. on Fri Jul 18^th, 2008 08:16 am .
And from Sinister on Mon Jul 21^st, 2008 12:56 pm . You can read , ... Quote ... you infantile boob. Don't they teach grammar in the omnipotent Britain? Fuckin' retard.
So check it out , if you wish . There is never a dull post in thisInternetAmerica vs great britain,war .
Way to dish it out Mockers . Great work .

And from all of us here at M O C K news .
To that very special crown polishing servant ...

[F.U.]

Our next story comes to us from Our own Mr Liquid . And is posted in our Funny Shit & Good Shit section of our forum . And is entitled ... The Dark Night . Folks this movie just may be the block buster of the year . Acording to Mr Liquid and I quote ...Well after seeing it i can say this 100% - it is amazing. It is not just a great "super hero" movie, it is an incredible movie from start to finish. I would be shocked if it does not win multiple awards and potentially even Best Picture.
As well as , Quote . I would recommend EVERYONE go see this movie.
If this report has peaked your interest , I would recommend reading the rest of Mr liquids review in his thread .

Thanks again Liquid for the wonderful review .





And from our mock forums administrator , in a thread started by Tommy Tourette called EIGHT DAYS AND EIGHTEEN HOURS ??? , we find a handy link posted . This link is to a brand new site exclusively for the POTD feature . Now this site is not just filled with the POTD 's from our beloved mock forum . But rather from many forums , all competing for the coveted POTD title . So lets give the inventors of this new POTD site a big round of applause .

... Insert applause sign here ...


Our next topic Comes to us from the - Discussions , Opinions & Debate section of our forum .

For some reason I feel compelled to mention this thread . Almost as if there is a force pushing me to bring this thread up .
You guessed it ... Zenith's witch powers .

Well this topic began as a mere mention in another thread and quickly became a stand alonediscussion ,
that ischocked full of insultsfrom both sides of the fence . While the general membership at Mock disregards the possibility of a supernatural force of this nature . That does not stop our resident Witch from speaking her mind .

So check it out for yourself . Or you may justhave a hex put on you .








~[ cue the marching band]~



Now we turn to the sports section of our broadcast .




This week in sports we all witnessed another of our countries athlete/heroes putting his life on holdfor his country .

You see , Caleb Campbell, a football player from Army, thought he was getting a shot to play pro football this fall. Caleb was a day away from practicing with the Detroit Lions and taking a step toward his dream of playing in the NFL. "He was issued a helmet, ready to go," coach Rod Marinelli said Wednesday. Now he's heading for active duty after the Army revised its interpretation of a Department of Defense policy on soldiers playing pro sports.
The U.S. Army revised its interpretation of U.S. Department of Defense policy two weeks ago regarding soldiers playing professional sports, requiring cadets to complete two years of active duty before applying for a release. Caleb will not be eligible to play until 2010.
Lets hope that in 2010 Caleb get thechance he so deserves .












Let's turnour attention to today's weather .

Today's weather is brought to you by M O C K Firearms . ..

Were at M O C K Firearms we say " Never bring a knife to a gun fight "



And M O C K ammunition .

M O C K ... the definition of accuracy .


Now lets take a look attoday's weather map ...

[F.U.]

I guess the weather map speaks for itself .

Its a hot one out there folks . And with no end to this heat in sight I want to remind you to keep an eye onyour elderly neighbors and pets .



Lets take a look now at next weeks forecast temps .

*** CLICK ***

[F.U.]

WOW its gunna be a hot one next week . With temps like that our air conditioners will surely be working overtime . Stay cool everyone and drink plenty of liquids .



Well that just about does it for this weeks weather .
As well as this weeks edition of M O C K News at 5 .
I would like to thank you all for joining me tonight , and everySunday here at M O C K News .







Good night Mock Land . This is your Mock reporter Pumpkin ass saying F . U .


Roll the disclaimer Bruno .

Views and or comments stated in this broadcast are that of the news caster . And not necessarily that of this forum , its owners or the administration or moderators of this forum . This broadcast was meant to irritate , aggravate and generally piss of those who disagree with the reporters opinion . Thank you for watching the slightly funny , almost irritating , lame ass edition of M O C K news at 5.

[LuMPyPussy]

I love Thursday's sun with the Xs for eyes.

[Sinister]

::fuckyeah:: Especially with that pic, this one is bound to get some votes for POTD!!! Great reporting, Mr Pumpkin Ass!!! ::lmao::






Replacing my old post with one at the bottom at the author's request.

MF, can you delete the one that matches this one?

[Middle Finger]

Great stuff, pumpkin fuck! ::thumbs::

[Duchess]

...I've come to look forward to the Mock News every week, F U...Its entertaining, original & often laugh outloud funny...It always gets my vote...You do a really wonderful job with it...

[Zenith]

Very funny and entertaining as hell too!

::banana::

[Middle Finger]

Dude, too much work for your stuff to be in the garbage can test forum! I moved it to here.

[Maggot]

Mock news is a stroke of genius, entertaining, enlightening and slightly warped.::thumbs::