11-17-2011, 09:41 PM
Dear shitheads:
Over the past few years I have noticed that newer cars and some older cars have the high intensity lights. Sometimes they are bluish and kinda blind the oncomers like they were looking at the sun going supernova. You see them way off in the distance coming at you like little blue devil eyes.
Well I have had enough of it. I can see if you were in the middle of nowhere and were on some dark dirt road and needed them to see if there were branches and shit in the road scraping the side of your Goddamn new Kia or Lexus and you were scared of the fucking dark and the fucking beasts that inhabit the woods, but on a paved road with dots and dashes that are painted on the road for the idiots that do not know what fucking side of the road to drive on, well they are useless, that is of coarse if you only need them to blind anyone that is coming at you enough so they drive off the road a goddamn mile before they even get to you.
So this is my solution. I have an off road truck that has 4 halogen high intensity lights across the top and regular lights where regular lights should be. I take the smiley faces off the stupid bulbs when I am alone in the woods and I am scared of bears and stuff. Grrrrrrr.
So today I took off the little elastic smiley faces and now drive with my twitching finger on the toggle switch waiting for some fool with those goddamn high intensity blue lights. When I see them I flick the switch and give them fuckers a goddamn suntan. Yeah thats right motherfuckers I will bathe you in the light of GOD and make you wish you had your stupid Ray Bans on. Hopefully you drive off the road, hit a fucking tree and it prevents any other headaches that you might bring on any unsuspecting victims.
So if you are driving and all of a sudden it feels like you are on some red carpet in la-la land remember it was me Maggot that decided to bring you back into the real world.
Hell the other day I saw a 1989 with the fucking things in.............
Thank You
Maggot.
Over the past few years I have noticed that newer cars and some older cars have the high intensity lights. Sometimes they are bluish and kinda blind the oncomers like they were looking at the sun going supernova. You see them way off in the distance coming at you like little blue devil eyes.
Well I have had enough of it. I can see if you were in the middle of nowhere and were on some dark dirt road and needed them to see if there were branches and shit in the road scraping the side of your Goddamn new Kia or Lexus and you were scared of the fucking dark and the fucking beasts that inhabit the woods, but on a paved road with dots and dashes that are painted on the road for the idiots that do not know what fucking side of the road to drive on, well they are useless, that is of coarse if you only need them to blind anyone that is coming at you enough so they drive off the road a goddamn mile before they even get to you.
So this is my solution. I have an off road truck that has 4 halogen high intensity lights across the top and regular lights where regular lights should be. I take the smiley faces off the stupid bulbs when I am alone in the woods and I am scared of bears and stuff. Grrrrrrr.
So today I took off the little elastic smiley faces and now drive with my twitching finger on the toggle switch waiting for some fool with those goddamn high intensity blue lights. When I see them I flick the switch and give them fuckers a goddamn suntan. Yeah thats right motherfuckers I will bathe you in the light of GOD and make you wish you had your stupid Ray Bans on. Hopefully you drive off the road, hit a fucking tree and it prevents any other headaches that you might bring on any unsuspecting victims.
So if you are driving and all of a sudden it feels like you are on some red carpet in la-la land remember it was me Maggot that decided to bring you back into the real world.
Hell the other day I saw a 1989 with the fucking things in.............
Thank You
Maggot.
He ain't heavy, he's my brother.
.....but you get the gist of that moment in time..........This is your gift. 
That was great, Maggot. I really liked the part about the suntan & bathing in the light of God.![[Image: Zy3rKpW.png]](https://i.imgur.com/Zy3rKpW.png)
![[Image: funny-pictures-moose-cop.jpg]](http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com/2007/12/funny-pictures-moose-cop.jpg)