Finger licking good

[Cynical Ninja]

Pfffft....tl;dr

Pfffft ....ti;dm
(to insignificant, doesn't matter)

Morning time in Angela's office, when she picks up her black, red, golden coloured phone and dials the number of whoever is in fucking charge of Cyprus.

"Hallo?"

"Ja, hallo, is that the office of the Chief Tzaitziki in Cyprus?"

"Yes."

"Good. You know what just happened in Greece, ja?"

"Yes"

"Good. We don't want that to happen to us ... ja?"

"No."

"Good. You got a shitload of those disgusting Brits on that island of yours who put all their money into your banks, ja?"

"Yes."

"Good, now this is what I want you to do or else I send my Love Parade down onto your island as well as playing Wagner ²⁴⁄₇ on that crappy radio station you got down there, understood?"

"Yes mam."

"Wunderbar."

And this is how we kick you Brits in the balls these days!

Anyway, before we pollute the whole place with our mutual love, I was thinking I shall create our very own thread, you know, like our very own G-Spot, then again, how would you know about such a thing, right? You are English after all.

What you think?

Again with the “we”, by “we” do you mean German? I thought you only had a kraut passport for “convenience” to facilitate your globetrotting pseudo playboy lifestyle fucknut?

Time to make a decision you euro mongrel, sausage munching nazi or ghoulash gobbling eastern european trash? Maybe you should flip a coin fatboy.

As for a kraut criticising someones sexual technique? Oh please! Krauts know both sexual positions “on top of” and “underneath”! Their complete lack of imagination and freedom of expression follows krauts into the bedroom.

“Guten targ Helga how was your date last night?”

“Ja it was acceptable we went to a reasonably priced sausage house near the flurgenjurgenburgen district and toasted each other with steins as fat as our heads”

“Ah! Das is gudt, then what did you do?”

“We proceded to a trendy techno club where we danced in a stiff and regimented manner to the latest hits by Kraftwerk and David Hasselhoff”

“Did you take him home to your sparsely decorated bauhaus in the spankenlichtenfuhrer district where you live?”

“Ja we watched the latest gangsta rap videos on the uberghetto channel then we proceded in an orderly fashion to the bedroom”

“Was he emotionally cold and distant in the bedroom Helga”

“Ja his balls were like ice cubes the sex was...efficient”

“Did he know both positions helga”

“Ja on top of AND underneath”

“Then what happened?”

“We each lit a cigarette turned our backs on each other and stared enigmatically into the middle distance”