hypothetical: calling all evil vagina monsters

[Donovan]

postscript to the Jonovan/ Eva pseudo-saga: took a begging, pleading series of texts from the ex claiming all innocence, wanting me to come home, it was all a big misunderstanding and she didn't quite know how it all blew up in her face. I helpfully reminded her it was when she tried to sneak around window shopping for a better man and thinking I wouldn't find out. I said goodbye, she said she was dying inside and would be alone forever. Which in her universe is about a week, because that's when the punkinhead fool she stepped out with announced he was in a new relationship...with her. LOL.

So for those of you playing along, this relationship went from dedicated and pre-wedlock (March 28) to dead and buried (May 8) in about six weeks, start to finish. That's gotta be a record. Fuck me, I'm really bad at this whole "judging relative sanity" thing. Even as arrogant and humble-braggish as I am I'm having a hard time spinning this into a personal talent. Maybe if there was a demand for batshit-crazy-detector. Or maybe all these crazy bitches are perfectly normal until they meet me, and my hidden talent is MAKING them completely nuts. Maybe I should have been calling it "Sith mind tricking" all this time...