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A person can't be raped without being a victim, by definition. I used the word because I'm literal and it's efficient and accurate. But, not all women and men who are raped refer to themselves as victims, many prefer survivor or no term at all.
Big difference between getting drunk, spreading your legs, regretting it and saying that you were taken advantage of vs. being drugged for the purpose of having sex without consent. I don't know what type of pathetic women you know, but I don't have any female friends or relatives who don't take responsibility for themselves sexually and in other ways. That doesn't mean they won't get raped (but I really hope none of them do).
I'm not seeing at all what you're seeing about women bearing no responsibility these days, in my little world or in the world at large -- just the opposite. Meh, different experiences and views, I guess.
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I think we've moved from women who wear too short dresses deserve what they get to women who get out of their minds drunk, maybe babble an incoherent "no" somewhere during the midst of sex as victims. I honestly think that too much burden/blame is placed on men these days. If I were a guy I think I'd want a written agreement before having drunk sex now.
ETA: the woman makes the determination as to whether she was raped or too drunk out of her mind to know what she agreed to. You don't think some women take that regret and spin it into rape?
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If a man puts his hands on you in a way you don't like or want and you continue to spend time with that man, it's on you. I don't want to hear any rape crying bullshit. I'm not going to care and I'm going to think you're a retard.
That's a general you.
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If someone secretly drugs a man or a woman, whether that man or woman be a genius or a 'retard', in order to render them semi-conscious or unconscious and have sex with them, that's 'rape' and the perpetrator is a 'rapist' -- by anyone's definition aside from perhaps the rapist himself and the mentally and morally depraved.
I'm kinda spent on posting about this rape crying bullshit story anyway, so you won't hear anymore about it from me.
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If a woman continues to spend time with a man who she thinks drugged & raped her why would she be deserving of anything? Why would she have a valid claim? I don't get that at all. When it happens the first time you make sure it doesn't happen again, at least that's what anyone who a normal thought process would do, you don't continue to put yourself in a position for it to happen again.
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(11-20-2014, 02:16 AM)username Wrote: ETA: the woman makes the determination as to whether she was raped or too drunk out of her mind to know what she agreed to. You don't think some women take that regret and spin it into rape?
The woman does not make the call when a rape accusation goes to court. She makes the accusation and the man gets to give his version of events. The judge or the jury makes the call. It's hard to prove date-rape though, so it doesn't get prosecuted a lot.
I know some women claim rape falsely. I'm not seeing any more of that than I did in the past in the news, and I don't see or hear it in my personal interactions at all. I don't think men are any more or less in need of a contract before sex than anytime in the past.
I know some men incapacitate women in order to have sex with them and then blame it on the woman, tell her she doesn't remember it accurately, say she deserved or wanted it... I'm seeing that more than in the past, especially with younger men who date-rape the girl (or initiate 'regrettable sex' with her -- if that's what you wanna call it, which is also what the rapists like to contend) -- and video tape and post it.
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(11-20-2014, 08:49 AM)Duchess Wrote: If a woman continues to spend time with a man who she thinks drugged & raped her why would she be deserving of anything? Why would she have a valid claim? I don't get that at all. When it happens the first time you make sure it doesn't happen again, at least that's what anyone who a normal thought process would do, you don't continue to put yourself in a position for it to happen again.
Young people who are being mentored by someone they respect and admire can be mind fucked when their mentor turns out to be drugging and raping them.
Some girls and women are strong enough psychologically and emotionally to not believe the mentor's bullshit excuses or lies the first time, if they have a pretty good idea of what happened even though they were drugged. So, they hit the road immediately. Others are weaker, more insecure, more dependent, or just don't care that much about themselves and figure it's worth the sacrifice. That's what I figure is the pretty obvious explanation as to why it happens.
I'll never think less of the people who've been raped than I do their serial rapist, under any circumstances. That doesn't mean I think highly of all people who have been raped or think they're deserving of anything. And, I acknowledge that if all girls and women were as strong, smart, tough, confident, etc... as you, user, and sally, there wouldn't be women who are raped more than once by the same serial rapist.
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And now, I'm really shutting the fuck up on this topic! For real this time.
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No don't stop! Your comments spark responses and that's what we want. Debate!
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(11-20-2014, 10:28 AM)Duchess Wrote:
No don't stop! Your comments spark responses and that's what we want. Debate!
She's all debated out!
(Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me! The End.
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(11-20-2014, 11:46 AM)Carsman Wrote: She's all debated out!
(Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me! The End. Good one, Cars.
Anyway........whether he's guilty or instead wrongly accused would be debatable, Duchess -- but that's not what we've been discussing and we can't know that unless he were to come out and admit he was guilty, as sally mentioned upthread.
Some PR gurus are advising him to come straight out and say he didn't do it, or come clean and admit he did (it's looking to be more likely that he did date rape some women, to me). I don't think he will do either.
Here's Bill Cosby's last known recorded words and reaction on the subject -- to an AP reporter earlier this month. It was released this morning.
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(11-20-2014, 12:49 PM)HairOfTheDog Wrote: (11-20-2014, 11:46 AM)Carsman Wrote: She's all debated out!
(Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me! The End. Good one, Cars.
Anyway........whether he's guilty or instead wrongly accused would be debatable, Duchess -- but that's not what we've been discussing and we can't know that unless he were to come out and admit he was guilty, as sally mentioned upthread.
Some PR gurus are advising him to come straight out and say he didn't do it, or come clean and admit he did (it's looking to be more likely that he did date rape some women, to me). I don't think he will do either.
Here's Bill Cosby's last known recorded words and reaction on the subject -- to an AP reporter earlier this month. It was released this morning.
I've never been a Cosby fan myself, and actually don't like the guy. Having said that, I'm getting the feeling that there are just one too many women willing to endure the unpleasantness of all the innuendos and disruption to their lives that these women will face. (are facing)
If he's truly innocent, he should be shouting that fact from the rafters that he is! I'm afraid his silence is tantamount to the fact that some (most) of those women (may be) are telling the truth.
Bill is not as wise as he thinks he is!
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I like the debate. It makes me feel a little bit like a monster.
I don't feel sorry for Cosby really. The price of fame and all that but in general, I don't think it's right to persecute someone for supposed crimes that happened 30+ years ago. The statute of limitations applies legally but one can still be ruined professionally and have their reputation/legacy smeared in to the dust all these years later. It just rubs me the wrong way.
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I can't help but think this will be an ongoing shot in the arm for comedians that do Cosby impressions.
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(11-20-2014, 02:50 PM)username Wrote: I like the debate. It makes me feel a little bit like a monster.
I don't feel sorry for Cosby really. The price of fame and all that but in general, I don't think it's right to persecute someone for supposed crimes that happened 30+ years ago. The statute of limitations applies legally but one can still be ruined professionally and have their reputation/legacy smeared in to the dust all these years later. It just rubs me the wrong way.
Have to agree. Bill's reputation is now MUD! He will never recover from these accusations, and that's only what they are at this point, accusations, there's no real tangible proof.
Could it be, a jilted woman 30+ years ago, finally got her revenge after all this time? And then some notoriety seekers are jumping on the band wagon? Questions, Questions.
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(11-20-2014, 09:21 AM)HairOfTheDog Wrote: Young people who are being mentored by someone they respect and admire can be mind fucked when their mentor turns out to be drugging and raping them.
Some girls and women are strong enough psychologically and emotionally to not believe the mentor's bullshit excuses or lies the first time, if they have a pretty good idea of what happened even though they were drugged. So, they hit the road immediately. Others are weaker, more insecure, more dependent, or just don't care that much about themselves and figure it's worth the sacrifice. That's what I figure is the pretty obvious explanation as to why it happens.
I don't buy that crap. I don't know about the rest of the women who claimed he raped them, but the two that I posted knew exactly what happened to them and went back for more because they had something to gain from him. That's called prostitution, not an innocent victim. That doesn't make him any less of a scumbag, but just saying.
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And so the saga continues!
Another woman has come forward claiming that the comedian and actor sexually assaulted her. Therese Serignese, a 57-year-old registered nurse from Boca Raton, Florida, now 38 years later she says she was raped by Cosby.
Serignese's accusations make her the seventh woman to publicly identify herself as a victim of Cosby's. It was said, Serignese was -- Jane Doe #10.
(Damn it Bill, "say something" and defend yourself if you dare!)
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(11-19-2014, 09:29 PM)Duchess Wrote: This story is all over the news here. A DA in PA said that while he can't pursue charges a form of criminal justice has been served with this public shaming of Bill Cosby. He (the DA) believes Bill is guilty of everything he has been accused of.
I checked out that interview. I agree with the DA. Sometimes justice can't be pursued in a courtroom for lack of tangible evidence, but fate kinda has a way of rendering it somewhere down the line.
I've done a bit more research. There's very little doubt in my mind that Bill Cosby is a sexual predator who lured, groomed, and then drugged and raped a slew of young aspiring writers and actresses.
I wouldn't want to be his wife as this continues to unravel. She's been married to him for 50 years. She's known for at least 10 years (civil court testimony) that if he didn't rape more than a dozen young women whom he'd coached/groomed during their marriage, he at least had sex with some of them.
Wonder how long it's gonna take for the public focus to shift to the wife for a while? It always does in these types of scandals. How could she stay? She enabled her husband by not leaving -- she's guilty too. She's a fraud for playing along as the ideal black couple/role models knowing her husband was chasing or raping young white women for decades. She was too weak to leave. She was in denial. She's a victim too..... <-- I think those kinds of questions and comments are going to be aimed at Mrs. Cosby from all angles soon enough, especially if her husband continues to stay silent.
I don't know how she feels or why she stays, but her face and demeanor in that very awkward AP video snip I posted upthread was sorta surreal to me.
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My dad had a story about Bill Cosby, fortunately it didn't involve rape. He was the night security guard at Quincy City hospital in MA in 1974. Bill Cosby came walking down the hallway, pointed his finger at him without saying anything and kept on walking, then he turned around and looked back at him twice. He never did find out why Bill was there. Most likely getting drugs for his next rape.
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