Did you ever have a relative that told true stories about you?

[newbiecollector]

Well I did, and Uncle. Every time we were around some of his lady freinds he would tell this story.


Lil' Newb delivered newspapers.

He knocks on a door, a lady answers, and he says, "Collect... thatll be five dollars." She says, "I'm a little short on cash, but if you want, I'll give you sex instead."Newb says, "All right."

He walks in, she undoes his pants, pulls them down, and there's the biggest wanker she's ever seen...it's huge for such a small kid.Newb reaches into his shirt pocket, pulls out a handful of huge washers, and starts sliding them onto his wanker.

She says, "You don't have to do that...I can take all of it."Newb says, "Not for five bucks you can't."

Please my Uncle.........I sent hime cash every month for the rest of his life::banana::

[Sinister]

Would you like to hear an actual true story? Here ya go:

Sinister and her sister were brought up to have manners and be well-behaved in restaurants and other public places. You didn't get loud, you didn't go running around, you don't interrupt, etc., etc.

One day, when Sinister is about 6 years old, she is having a meal with her Mom, Dad and Sister in a restaurant. At a booth nearby there is a young child being very loud, screeching and hollering, arguing with his parents, getting up from the table and running around, and yelling for no fucking reason whatsoever.

Mom is starting to wince, and she mutters something about how someone should stick something in that child's mouth. To which Sinister replies; "Yeah, like a hand grenade".

All of my family still tells that story.

[newbiecollector]

What the fuk? You don't think my story was true?

[Duchess]

Hahaha...I can totally picture that, it made me laugh outloud, I saw you as that darling little girl holding a knife in another thread...You were born a spitfire.

[newbiecollector]

Hahaha...I can totally picture that, it made me laugh outloud, I saw you as that darling little girl holding a knife in another thread...You were born a spitfire.

Sinister is a spitter?

I never knew that:shock:

[Sinister]

Hahaha...I can totally picture that, it made me laugh outloud, I saw you as that darling little girl holding a knife in another thread...You were born a spitfire.

Heh. Even as a pup my first reaction was to kick ass!! ::lmao:: ::bigg::