The Felony-Stupid Criminal File

[LuciferLynn]

Is that the same kid? Doesn't he have any clothes?

[Lady Cop]

9 hours!

alleged burglar, Manuel Fernandes, 54, tried to break into Rent-A-Center in Brockton, Massachusetts via the garage, but failed when the metal bed frame he used to prop open the door didn't hold and it came down on his head. Stuck for nine hours, Fernandes was discovered by the store manager John Rodriguez at 9 a.m. and attempted to claim that he was in fact there to fix the door.

[Lady Cop]

Dim Bubba (dim bulb?? hahaha) Ambala, from Birmingham England was first caught raiding an apartment in his own block of flats which officers had set up with cameras in an elaborate sting operation . But just six months later he was caught shoplifting from a 3 mobile store when he made off with worthless display mobile phones which he thought were real. He was given a six-month prison sentence so he would be released in time to go back to college and continue his studies.

Dim Bubba Ambala, 19, was first caught raiding an apartment in his own block of flats which officers had set up with cameras in an elaborate sting operation.

But, despite being given a suspended sentence for that crime, he clearly had not learned his lesson.

Just six months later he was caught shoplifting from a high street store when he made off with three worthless display mobile phones which he thought were real.

full story with pics:

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-...z23oxCdzV4

[Lady Cop]

dumb heifer!





WSBTV

video of arrest--->

http://www.wsbtv.com/news/news/local/rec...-of/nRLbC/


CLAYTON COUNTY, Ga. —

Police have arrested an officer accused of trying to buy drugs on her lunch break, and it's all caught on tape.

Channel 2's Mark Winne obtained undercover video that shows the officer, who was wearing the camera with his gun drawn, as he walked up to the Clayton County officer's car.

Butts County Sheriff Gene Pope said a Clayton County corrections officer and deputy in training, Christina Danielle Allen, made an appointment for her lunch break to buy a highly addictive painkiller, Roxicodone.

"That's a heavily abused drug?" Winne asked Pope.

"Yes it is," Pope said.

Pope said she even asked the alleged drug dealer for a police discount before she left the Georgia Public Safety Training Center, where she was in training to move up to deputy.

"We were monitoring a phone used by a known drug dealer and that phone started receiving texts regarding the purchase of some pills," Pope told Winne.

Allen's arrest was caught on camera from the arresting officer.

On the video you can hear the officer say to Allen, "That has got to be the stupidest thing a law enforcement officer can do! OK? You're under arrest for possession of a controlled substance. You will not finish the academy. You will not go back to work as a police officer. You understand that?"

"She came up, made the purchase and we made the arrest," Pope said.

Allen has now been charged with drug possession and violating her oath.

[Lady Cop]

newslocal10
DOVER, Fla. -
A Hillsborough County man is accused of calling 911 to ask for female deputies to respond to his home for sexual gratification.

oh sure, we'll be right there.

Jail records show Joshua Basso was arrested Friday on seven counts of making false 911 calls. The 31-year-old from Dover is being held on $3,500 bail. An attorney is not listed for him.

A sheriff's office report says Basso admitted to deputies that he made the seven calls to 911 between Wednesday and Friday. He was arrested without incident.

Jail records also show Basso was arrested in March 2011 on charges of stalking and lewd and lascivious behavior. The charges were later reduced to misdemeanors.

[Duchess]

*ick*

[Kip]

"Ick" is right. I think I'd want to respond to the call wearing a hazmat suit.

[Lady Cop]

KNOXVILLE, Tenn. (AP) - Police in Knoxville say two men attempted to carjack a vehicle, but failed because they couldn't drive a stick shift.

The Knox County Sheriff's Department told WVLT-TV in Knoxville that 18-year-old Jamel Wilson and a juvenile approached the car of Broor Swahn at about 1:30 a.m. EDT Monday.

Swahn says one of them pulled out a gun, got in the car, and tried to take off. Deputies say neither of them knew how to drive a car with a manual transmission. They got out and fled on foot.

Patrol units in the area quickly spotted and arrested the two men. They also recovered a gun.

The sheriff's department says Wilson was being held on $50,000 bond and is due to appear in court on Sept. 20.

------>

[Lady Cop]

damn, i love cannoli, but this is crazy! just off the plane and does an armed robbery for a cannoli?? remember the twinkie defense?



BOSTON -- A tourist from Ireland apparently couldn’t wait to get his hands on an Italian pastry from Boston’s North End.

Prosecutors say just hours after 25-year-old Robert McTernan landed in Boston for a two-week vacation, he entered a bakery in the largely Italian neighborhood, grabbed a knife and demanded a cannoli from an employee.

The worker at Bova’s Bakery handed McTernan the pastry made from creamy ricotta cheese wrapped in a crunchy shell, then called police at about 3:30 a.m. Thursday.

Officers found the Newbridge, Ireland resident in the kitchen and arrested him on an armed robbery charge. Police could not find the knife.

McTernan was granted $2,000 bail after pleading not guilty at his arraignment and ordered to surrender his passport.

[HairOfTheDog]

Police score a hat trick...



Carmen Reategui, 34 (pictured on the right, above) was pulled over in Readington, New Jersey on Dec. 16^th. Reategui had swerved while driving and failed a field sobriety test.

She called Nina Petracca (pictured on the left, above) to pick her up, but police threw the 23-year-old into a cell because she showed up visibly intoxicated and they found seven illegal Vicodin pills in Petracca's purse. She was slapped with an additional charge of possession of a controlled substance to go with the DUI.

Another friend, 33-year-old Ryan Hogan, answered the women's call for help and jumped into action to spring his friends. But, yep, you guessed it; he too was wasted, failed sobriety tests, and was tossed in the slammer.

Finally, a fourth adult arrived who was sober enough to drive the three stooges home.

Maybe the idiots can all carpool to court for their January DUI hearings?

Ref: http://www.nj.com/hunterdon-county-democ...ck_up.html

[Duchess]

I knew she had shit for brains the moment I saw her jersey.

[HairOfTheDog]

I knew she had shit for brains the moment I saw her jersey.

She is one dumb woman with more than one dumb friend, indisputable.

Their level of stupidity is hilarious, to me.

Best thing LE can do is to get them out from behind the wheel before their stupidity stops being funny because they hurt or kill somebody.

Desperately dopey dipshits.

[HairOfTheDog]

Yeah, he's stupid -- but his intentions were good!

An Albuquerque, New Mexico, man is facing charges after police say he drove a stolen electric shopping cart to meet with his probation officer.



Court papers say 18-year-old Michael Johnson rode the electric shopping cart this week to make his scheduled visit. When the probation officer asked Johnson where he got the cart, court documents say Johnson admitted taking it from an Albuquerque Walmart.

Johnson was arrested and charged with larceny and receiving stolen property. He also violated his probation when he was arrested and was ordered held on a $500 bond.

Albuquerque police spokesman Tanner Tixier says the cart is worth more than $1,800.

[RJs-Ex]

Makes me wonder if the dude is handicapped or something? Those carts don't even go that fast, he'd probably get there quicker just walking!

[HairOfTheDog]

What a gem



^ Walter Earl Morrison, 20, is a former UPS employee accused of swiping a package while unloading cargo at Sky Harbor Airport in Phoenix. He figured the package contained cash, according to a probable cause statement.

Authorities say the "half-baked bandit" traded the package, which actually contained a $160,000 diamond, for two joints of marijuana.

The diamond was later recovered and returned to its intended recipient. Morrison was arrested Sept. 16 on a felony theft charge. He is scheduled for arraignment Oct. 1.

[HairOfTheDog]

43-year-old Michael Kevin Meadows was arrested today.

Authorities say Meadows went into a pharmacy in Beaver, West Virginia wearing full camouflage and a paintball mask.

The would-be robber started spraying pepper spray in an effort to take down employees, but then walked into the cloud of pepper spray in front of him.

He stumbled out empty-handed and got into the get away car which police quickly tracked down. The get away driver ratted out Meadows who's now in jail on $100k bond and facing attempted robbery charges.

[Duchess]

The would-be robber started spraying pepper spray in an effort to take down employees, but then walked into the cloud of pepper spray in front of him.

Fully fledged hicktard.

[HairOfTheDog]

See ya later....



This genius burglar, ^ Matthew Riggins - 22, was dressed in black lurking behind homes when he was spotted by residents, leading to a police search of the area that involved a helicopter and dog units.

Riggins and a partner in crime had pulled off a string of burglaries in the area.

Riggins' partner was arrested. Riggins, on the other hand, really didn't want to get busted. So, he eluded police by hiding in a pond.

Well, police found some of Riggins' body in Barefoot Bay, Florida ten days later. The rest of his body was found inside an 11-foot alligator (who has since been euthanized).

What a way to go.

Story: http://news.yahoo.com/suspected-burglar-...33932.html#

[Duchess]

He's in Florida and he hides in a pond. He is obviously too stupid to live. You don't just go into ponds there for Godssake, alligators lurk in them. Hahaha. My parents home and a shit ton of others have pools that are enclosed so gators don't get in them. His stupidity is mind boggling.

[SIXFOOTERsez]

LOL, I read that one this morning, gave me a lil chuckle