Corrupt Wish Granting

[LuMPyPussy]

Granted... but your head is filled with nightmares of a three way involving you, Sinister and Ramsey...

I wish I worked closer to home

That was completely uncalled for.

[Cynical Ninja]

I wish I was more tolerant...

So you become a hippy living in a cardboard box half way up a tree, you never bathe and wear Jesus sandals and flowers in your hair, your hippy girlfriend "starlight" has genital warts and hairy armpits.

I wish I was Batman...

[crash]

Granted...You become Batman but the Wayne Foundation files for bankruptcy the follwing day due to the Global Economic Crisis. Robin decides that a life of crime pays better and joins up with the Penguins crew cooking meth and overseeing a grow house... all your gadgets, including the Batmobile are sold at a fire sale and are bought up by The Riddler for a song... The Joker, seeing you vulnerable, kidnaps you and drugs you then films you comatose in your Batman suit in a B grade gimp porn flick titled "Splatman".. finally, Catwoman has had enough of your sorry arse and hooks up with her new sugar daddy, Alfred, who has amazingly come into a new found wealth after the collapse of the Wayne foundation..

I wish they still made scorched peanut bars